Super Familiar with The Wilsons
Marriage 2.0 with kids…and all the side quests!
Super Familiar with the Wilsons is a weekly comedy podcast about second marriage blended family life, and the beautiful chaos of parenting, aging, and figuring it all out (again). Hosted by Amanda and Josh, partners in life, love, and side quests, each episode dives into real-life stories, quirky observations, listener emails, and spontaneous tangents that somehow always circle back to relationships, resilience, and the absurdity of modern life.
Whether you’re navigating your own second act, raising kids who don’t want your help, or just wondering why birds seem to aim for your head, you’ll find humor, honesty, and heart here. Expect: offbeat storytelling, second-marriage dynamics, parenting fails, philosophical detours, and new friends you didn’t know you needed.
Familiar Wilsons Media produces content to bring people together. We are curious, hopeful, and try not to take ourselves too seriously...admittedly, with varying degrees of success.
Super Familiar with The Wilsons
Find us on instagram at instagram.com/superfamiliarwiththewilsons
and on Youtube
Contact us! familiarwilsons@gmail.com
Super Familiar with The Wilsons
We Find Out If Taking Listener Questions is A Bad Idea
We've let Dan Belson ask us questions. We've probably made a huge mistake with this one.
Music
"Wilson Theme", "EEAAOO", "Bad Timing", "A Little Swing", "Together", and "The Wilson Suite" by Josh Wilson.
Super Familiar with The Wilsons
Find us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/wilsonspodcast
on instagram at instagram.com/superfamiliarwitthewilsons
on twitter at https://twitter.com/familiarwilsons
and on Youtube
Contact us! familiarwilsons@gmail.com
Super Familiar with The Wilsons
Find us on instagram at instagram.com/superfamiliarwiththewilsons
and on Youtube
Contact us! familiarwilsons@gmail.com
The following program uses naughty language and discusses adult situations. Shall we go? Let's go.
SPEAKER_00:This week on Super Familiar with the Wilsons...
SPEAKER_02:Amanda, we're going to reach into the listener mailbag.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, let's go. No more rhymes now, I mean it.
SPEAKER_02:Anybody want a peanut? Welcome to Super Familiar with the Wilsons. I'm Josh and I like to draw pretty pictures.
SPEAKER_00:I'm Amanda, and I like to hot glue things. This is the thing we're doing now? We're just going to start talking about ourselves?
SPEAKER_02:Well, we're very happy to be here. We're very happy to be talking to you because we didn't know really whether we'd be recording today. We very, very luckily dodged Hurricane Ian, or I should say Hurricane Ian dodged us. Now, there were a lot of people who weren't at all as lucky, and our hearts go out to them, but we are happy to be here talking to you today.
SPEAKER_00:We are. It was a scary few days for us, but it's going to be a much more dark time for a lot of people south of us. So we're thinking of those in our state and also our fellow podcasters and family who are in the Charleston area. They got hit with it as well. So thinking of everyone and continue to let us know how we can support you.
SPEAKER_02:Yes. So we are going to get to our listener letters, but first... The Song Quiz. I've got a new song quiz this morning. Now, we didn't have this morning or whenever you're listening to it. It's not even morning when we're recording this. I don't know what's happening. We do have a new song quiz. We didn't do one last week, so this is starting fresh. Artist and song, I give you a clever clue, a genius clue, some would say, and then you try to sort it out, and bada-bing, bada-boom. Some people find it easier to try to figure out the artist first, and then the song from that. So, that's the order in which I will give it you. The artist is 24 Hours to Celebrate Mohammad Reza Pavlavi, the former leader of Iran.
SPEAKER_00:Wow.
SPEAKER_02:That's the artist.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:The song is This Person Who Answers the Phone Ain't Rough, Is She?
SPEAKER_00:Okay. Good luck, friends.
SPEAKER_02:So once again, the artist is 24 Hours to Celebrate Mohammad Reza Pavlavi, the former leader of Iran. And the song is This Person Who Answers the Phone Ain't Rough, Is She?
SPEAKER_00:All right, well, I have zero clue. So
SPEAKER_02:how might people give us the answer to these things?
SPEAKER_00:They might hit us up on our DMs. That's right. I'm telling you it's okay to slide up into these DMs because we don't want you to tweet it out publicly. We want people to have to work for it. Listen, I have to work for it around here. These song quizzes do not come easily to me. Some of you, like our friend Ashley, just pick up the phone and give us a voice message of her working through it, and she's brilliant at it, and I can't do it. So... If you have our personal cell phone numbers, like Ashley, go ahead and send us a voice message. Or you can DM us at FamiliarWilsons. That is the tweeting business.
SPEAKER_02:Yes.
SPEAKER_00:And there's also like some emailing happening, which is where I assume these listener letters come from.
SPEAKER_02:FamiliarWilsons at gmail.com.
SPEAKER_00:There's also Facebook, but who, I mean... Who does Facebook?
SPEAKER_02:Zuck does. I mean, if you're doing Instagram, you're basically doing Facebook because Facebook owns it and they get all your data anyway. So if you're being all precious about, I don't get on Facebook so they can't access my data, Instagram has it, friends. Sorry about you.
SPEAKER_00:You can also hit us up on Instagram, DMs. That's cool too. That's super familiar with Wilson's on Instagram.
SPEAKER_02:Bam.
UNKNOWN:Bam.
SPEAKER_02:Letters, we get letters, we read them, and then we answer them if it's appropriate.
SPEAKER_00:Most likely isn't.
SPEAKER_02:So yes, we're going to debut a new segment, The Listener Mailbag. So I've got some questions here. They're really listener questions.
SPEAKER_00:This is like an ask me anything, basically, right? So it's just the non-live version of an AMA.
SPEAKER_02:What?
SPEAKER_00:You know, ask me anything. The influencers and the content creators, they live stream and say, ask me anything. And then the people just ask anything live. But now we're just going to do- Is that what AMA stands for? Well, it also stands for like American Movie Academy or something. I don't know. But yeah, AMA- On the socialist means ask me anything.
SPEAKER_02:Shit, I never knew that.
SPEAKER_00:See, I taught you something. Damn.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. So AMA, kids. AMAW. Ask
SPEAKER_00:me anything.
SPEAKER_02:Ask Wilson's anything.
SPEAKER_00:AWA.
SPEAKER_02:Not AMAW. So now it's time for our AWA segment. Ask Wilson's anything.
SPEAKER_00:I like it. I like this new segment.
SPEAKER_02:So we have some questions here. Now, to kick this off, I will admit that all of these questions are from the same person. These are all from Dan Belson.
SPEAKER_00:I don't like this segment anymore.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, so first, and this is the question. I have such reservations about this. This is the question. How to survive a hurricane?
SPEAKER_00:Oh, well, okay.
SPEAKER_02:Ideally, don't be in its path. But that's really difficult, as we just explained. We were in its path for a day or so, and then all of a sudden we weren't in its path. I think I said this last podcast that described... waiting for a hurricane is like being stalked by a turtle. And I might add, it's like being stalked by an indecisive turtle.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and I laughed a lot because it's so true. I mean, I'm a native Floridian. I have hurricanes in my blood. And so I identify with that. But also, yes, it changes. And the thing is, it changes so many times, but you can't not prepare. And so we were, I mean, work shut down for three days, schools shut down, shelters opened. We were expecting to get hit. we packed up. We went to stay at Josh's work because he was, he was going to be on call. And we got there and like nary a little thing. No, Barry, we got tropical storm winds, right? Yeah. So, I mean, I'll take it. And it's been devastating. It's changing the West coastline of Southwest Florida forever. It's a very devastating storm. Probably one of the most deadly in this, or the most deadly in the state's history. I
SPEAKER_02:don't know about deadly. Um, definitely most costly. Is it also the most deadly?
SPEAKER_00:I mean, we're at high 20s in the count right now. For fatalities? For fatalities, but we don't know an actual count for Andrew, so yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Right. So ideally, don't be there. There's several problems with that theory. Number one is don't really know where it's going to go. And by the time you do have a good grasp on where it's going to go, the interstates are plugged up. So better to be in your home than on 75 or on 95 in a car, you know, getting blown away.
SPEAKER_00:Less of a chance. But the other thing I've been hearing a lot of people saying, why didn't people evacuate? And I mean, it's a matter of equity. It costs, I saw a stat, it costs on average$1,200 for a person to evacuate for a storm. What? If they don't, I mean, as far as like gas and having to pay for a hotel. I mean, that's the average if you don't have family to go stay with. And so it's not always feasible for people to evacuate.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, no, it's true. Okay, great. Well, that was fun. Thank you, Dan.
SPEAKER_00:I was just saying that because we need to have a little bit more empathy and patience for the people who were impacted instead of saying, why didn't you evacuate?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, no, no, no. I absolutely agree. Okay, equally serious question. Next one. Big penis or small penis? Discuss.
SPEAKER_00:To own, to have applied upon you? What does this question?
SPEAKER_02:It just says discuss.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:I mean, I myself, I'd like to think that what I have is an extra medium. Okay.
SPEAKER_00:Extra medium. It's like extra small, small, medium, extra medium, large, extra large. Medium is the only thing that doesn't have an extra.
SPEAKER_02:Mine does.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. I'm perfectly satisfied. Move along.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. Next question. What's the best color? I would say the color of money.
SPEAKER_00:No. There's
SPEAKER_02:also the color of night. The color purple. Ooh, living color.
SPEAKER_00:What's the best color? The best color is the color of twilight. And I don't mean the vampire movies. It's not quite night, but the day is ended. I love that time of day so much. Is that the
SPEAKER_02:golden hour?
SPEAKER_00:No, the golden hour is still day. I mean, the sun is still up. I
SPEAKER_02:like the golden hour.
SPEAKER_00:The golden hour is a beautiful
SPEAKER_02:color. I like the golden girls.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, cool. I think Twilight, whatever color that is, is the best color.
SPEAKER_02:I think whatever it is, it's sparkly.
SPEAKER_00:It is sparkly. That's true. Back to the vampires, yes.
SPEAKER_02:I like red. I like maroon. That's my favorite
SPEAKER_00:color. I like cranberry red.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:It's a great color. What's your favorite color, Dan?
SPEAKER_02:That's not how this works. Next, if hell does exist, how hot does it really get? I
SPEAKER_00:don't think hell is hot. I think hell is very, very lonely. Okay. I don't think it's a temperature. I
SPEAKER_02:don't know how lonely it'll be. I think there's going to be a lot of people there.
SPEAKER_00:No, but I mean, to me, hell would be being separated from the people that you love and just being on your own. And that's what that is. It's dark and it's cold.
SPEAKER_02:I think that hell is going to be really cold. I don't mind hot weather. I like cool weather. Cold, cold weather, like chilling to your bone cold, do not like.
SPEAKER_00:So did you just say that hell was like northern Minnesota?
SPEAKER_02:I don't know. I've never been there. Hell is really cold. Okay. It's also filled with Buffalo Bills fans.
SPEAKER_00:Maybe Buffalo. Upstate New York. Buffalo is really
SPEAKER_02:cold. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe that's hell. Okay. Next question. What's the most pointless insect?
SPEAKER_00:Dan's brain is an interesting place to be.
SPEAKER_02:It's hell, some would say.
SPEAKER_00:That's right. It's not Buffalo. Pointless insect. Well, I mean, they all have meaning to themselves.
SPEAKER_02:No, no, no. This is not an existential question. I would say mosquitoes are the most pointless insect. They do nothing constructive. They are not the primary food source for any animal. They spread disease, malaria, all these things. They are uncomfortable. They hurt you when they bite you and they suck your blood. My answer is mosquitoes, the little mozzies. Let's get rid of them. Hell is filled with mosquitoes.
SPEAKER_00:But also cockroaches. Is there a point to them?
SPEAKER_02:I think that they are scavengers. They like break things down. You need them to... to get rid of garbage and stuff.
SPEAKER_00:And they don't carry diseases, right?
SPEAKER_02:I think they do. They're gross. They're disgusting. They are gross. But I think that they have more of a point than mosquitoes do. Mosquitoes are just miserable things. Mosquitoes are the embodiment of misery they are.
SPEAKER_00:Do you think they're miserable themselves? Or do you think they're very happy with their little lives flying around and stinging things?
SPEAKER_02:Well, would you be happy if your life was predicated on making other people uncomfortable? Everyone hates you. And you gotta suck blood. You don't know where that blood's been. That's gross. Like you're compelled to suck blood. They're not even as good as vampires because at least vampires are ageless. They don't die.
SPEAKER_00:What's the lifespan of a mosquito?
SPEAKER_02:It depends.
SPEAKER_00:On whether or not you
SPEAKER_02:smack it? On how fast it can fly. On how deft it, how quick it is. Whether it's got moves. Whether it's got handles.
SPEAKER_00:Handles?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, it's a basketball term.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. Okay. It's a very different picture in my brain, but okay.
SPEAKER_02:All right, next question. I'll let you take this one. Anal sex, the devil's business?
SPEAKER_00:Well, I mean, some Christians would say yes, that sodomy is a sin, which therefore makes it the devil's business.
SPEAKER_02:Wait, sodomy?
SPEAKER_00:Next. Yeah. Sodomy is anal sex, basically. Is it? I mean, I don't think that it's gender specific.
SPEAKER_02:All right, I'm... I am.
SPEAKER_00:Oh God, I hope you're Googling that.
SPEAKER_02:Any of various forms of sexual acts regarded as perverted, especially anal intercourse or all the things. A natural sexual relation. Is there, I mean, consenting adults and all that? I
SPEAKER_00:am not giving you my personal opinion on this. He asked if it was the devil's business and my answer is that it is the view of modern Christianity that yes, that is a sin.
SPEAKER_02:Or what do you think?
SPEAKER_00:I'm not giving you my answer on this.
SPEAKER_02:Why?
SPEAKER_00:Because it's not a conversation I'm willing to have.
SPEAKER_02:Can we talk about it later?
SPEAKER_00:We can talk about it later.
SPEAKER_02:Next question is, how many squirrels would it take to beat you in a fight?
SPEAKER_00:Squirrels are ferocious, dude. Are they? Yeah. They're like rabbit and stuff.
SPEAKER_02:I don't know anything about squirrels except they're these cute little things with the bushy tails. I think that it depends on how determined they are. Because for me, I have a real hesitancy with the thought of killing anything. Like I'm a pacifist. So now if it were my life, maybe. But the problem with that is because I'm not that alpha about it all. I wouldn't take them seriously, and if they were really determined, they could take me before I realized what trouble I was in. Do
SPEAKER_00:you have an issue with killing the mosquitoes?
SPEAKER_02:No, no, no, no, no, all day I'll kill. I wonder how many mosquitoes it would take to finish me off.
SPEAKER_00:Right, probably many. You'd be like Gulliver's Travels, like they pinned you down in the mosquitoes game. So I worked at a summer camp in North Carolina, and my last summer there, one of the older campers
SPEAKER_02:Was taken away by mosquitoes?
SPEAKER_00:No, squirrels. A singular squirrel was walking between two trees and a squirrel tried to leap from one limb to the other but landed on his face instead and just clung on. Oh my God. Imagine your face and then the squirrel's belly is to your nose and then his front claws are digging into your forehead and his bottom claws are digging into your chin. So you know,
SPEAKER_02:you say that his belly, maybe he just wanted a nice tickle.
SPEAKER_00:Well.
SPEAKER_02:It's like a nuzzle into his.
SPEAKER_00:This poor camper's face was clawed up.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So, and imagine, like you're not expecting it.
SPEAKER_02:No one expects a squirrel to the face.
SPEAKER_00:No, you're not prepared for it.
SPEAKER_02:So in that answer one, okay. Who would your kids miss most if you both died in a horrific accident? And I do mean horrific.
SPEAKER_00:Me.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, it's true. Without a doubt, they would miss you. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:They'd miss you. They'd just miss me more. I mean,
SPEAKER_02:they would notice that I
SPEAKER_00:was
SPEAKER_02:gone. What do you think? They would be like, oh, that guy who took most of mommy's attention is gone now. Yay.
SPEAKER_00:No, that's awful. Don't say that.
SPEAKER_02:Okay, next. Is tennis in the top three most boring sports?
SPEAKER_00:You like tennis.
SPEAKER_02:I love tennis. Listen, I grew up and was watching tennis when the adults around me were watching tennis in the 80s. And that was, to me, like the golden age. Of course, everyone says that. Actually, most people would say the golden age is like Pete Sampras and that group, Andre Agassi. But I grew up watching like Yvonne Lendl and Jimmy Connors and McEnroe. So I love tennis. Now... Boring sports. You want to talk boring sports? Golf. Golf. Boring sports. Golf is such a weird sport anyway. Golf, I feel like, was invented by someone who wanted a non-confrontational version of hockey.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. It's a good point.
SPEAKER_02:That they could smoke and drink beer while stewing.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. So my dad was a golf pro and taught golf lessons.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, right. He was a pro. I'm sorry. I did not mean to insult
SPEAKER_00:your family business. No, I mean, it's what he did like when he retired. He was... Again,
SPEAKER_02:golf is what people can do when they're retired. Should not be a professional sport.
SPEAKER_00:No. And it used to drive him nuts because he would try so hard and I was zero bit interested. And he took my mom to play one time and legend says... that she beat him and he never took her again. I'm not entirely sure. That's a
SPEAKER_02:sitcom right there.
SPEAKER_00:My dad and my two older brothers played golf very regularly. When my dad retired, he worked at a driving range. He worked on a golf course. He was happy to drive the little machine around and pick all the balls up. Like it was just, he taught lessons. It was his life, but he would watch it and immediately fell asleep because it is horribly boring. And then I'd be stuck with golf on TV. And if you changed it, he'd wake up. But yeah, now mini golf, I can get behind.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's okay because it's short. Cricket. It seems like such a Calvin Ball type of sport. Are you familiar with that? No, I don't know what that means. Calvin Ball basically means you're making up the rules as you go along type of sport. To me, it seems like cricket was invented by someone who, everything they ever knew about sport in general was from a Looney Tunes cartoon. And then as they became an adult, someone's like, hey, Why don't you invent a sport? And they're like, okay. Did you know that the average match happens over a span of five days?
SPEAKER_00:What?
SPEAKER_02:Six to eight hours a day.
SPEAKER_00:Are you joking?
SPEAKER_02:No, I've had employment situations that were shorter than that.
SPEAKER_00:Wow. I mean, I get really tired when like baseball goes into extra innings.
SPEAKER_02:So that's not even extra. That's like that's like designated time. The longest one was nine days was scheduled to be 10 days, but they had to cut it short because of like someone had to catch a plane or a train or something.
SPEAKER_00:Right. Yes. No life moved on. And so must they.
SPEAKER_02:Yes. No. So cricket. Absolutely not. And then bowling. Bowling is really boring because it's boring to watch because you get to the point of the professional bowlers, it's basically all strikes and spares. Big deal.
SPEAKER_00:I also don't like watching billiards. I understand that people do, but it's not a thing I
SPEAKER_02:like. Oh, now I do like watching the billiard trick shots. The trick shots are fun. Those are cool.
SPEAKER_00:But you might as well just watch Jude Perfect.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's right. Next question. Is Attenborough overrated? No. Okay, next question. Should everyone who wears Jordans be questioned in the street about his career stats?
SPEAKER_00:Jordan's career stats are their own personal career
SPEAKER_02:stats. Oh, that, I didn't even go there, no.
SPEAKER_00:I think he means like you're wearing Jordan's so you need to know about Michael Jordan.
SPEAKER_02:Oh no, I think it's a commentary on people who wear athletic gear and especially, you know what I can't stand is middle-aged dudes who wear jerseys. Sports jerseys. Now, in my 20s and 30s, I had a Dolphins.
SPEAKER_00:You have a jersey hanging up in the closet. I have a
SPEAKER_02:Panthers jersey, and I have it for Nostalgia's sake, but I never wear it.
SPEAKER_00:That's true.
SPEAKER_02:Also, it's very warm. But it's a weird thing, grown-ass men wearing jerseys.
SPEAKER_00:It really is. No one is
SPEAKER_02:going to... And especially the personalized... I'm thinking if I get Wilson on the back of a Dolphins jersey, I'm walking in the mall, and someone's going to be like, wait, is that... Is that the wide receiver from the
SPEAKER_00:Dolphins? Clearly no.
SPEAKER_02:The whole thing is quite strange. It's like adult cosplay for people who make fun of cosplayers. And imagine their head, you know, at center, a 5'5 accountant from bookkeeping, Arnold Clawhopper. This is ridiculous. Yes.
SPEAKER_00:So I do think that Dan's question, and Dan let us know, but I do think his question was that if you're wearing Jordans, you should have to give Michael Jordan's career stats. But it's funnier to me to have them give their own career stats.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. Next question. What's the best meal, breakfast, lunch, or dinner?
SPEAKER_00:I mean, I put more thought into dinner. Although I really should, it should be that, I mean, and it's the thing that people say, like eat breakfast like a king and dinner like a popper, but you really should Wait, wait,
SPEAKER_02:wait, I'm sorry,
SPEAKER_00:what? You've not heard this? No. So it's the thought of your heaviest meal should be earlier in the day, so you're spending more of the calories and energy throughout the day instead of, you know. I don't
SPEAKER_02:think that's how nutrition actually should work. I'm just telling you. I think it's a bunch of small meals through the day is what's appropriate. Right. Because if you eat a lot of food, a lot of calories at one sitting, you'll only use so much of it and then the rest of it gets stored into fat. Right. This has been Health Moment with Josh Wilson. Josh and Amanda Wilson are not, nor do they claim to be, medical professionals. They are just two people with healthy imaginations, a good internet connection, and some time to kill.
SPEAKER_00:I've never been a breakfast eater. Never ever in my life have I been a breakfast eater. And you wake up ready to eat. The five-year-old wakes up ready to eat. I've never been a breakfast eater. To the point where when I was in... school, my mom would make me drink carnation instant breakfast, which just basically tastes like mineral mixed in milk with a little bit of chocolate. It's gross because I don't like breakfast. And then lunch, mostly I spend that at work. And it's amazing how you'll eat things at work that you won't eat at home. So when I'm at the grocery store and I buy the turkey and the lettuce for the lettuce wraps, and I think, oh, I'm going to eat this. And then at home, I don't want to eat it. But if I take it to work, I'll eat it because that's what's there. And dinner, I think, is probably my favorite meal, but I just don't get inspired or interested by anything we make during the week.
SPEAKER_02:Well, that's bullshit because I make steaks. And those are yummy, but when's the last
SPEAKER_00:time you made
SPEAKER_02:that for me? It was a couple weeks ago. Okay. Right? Okay. So your point is what? I want one. Okay. I'll give you a big, fat piece of meat real soon.
SPEAKER_00:Okay. Extra medium size.
SPEAKER_02:I think that breakfast has the best food. I do. I love all sorts of omelets. You really don't have eggs at any other meal except breakfast. I love bacon. Again, you don't really have bacon at any other meal but breakfast. Hash browns, so good with the cheese, grits, all of the things. The breakfast absolutely has the best food. So I would say breakfast.
SPEAKER_00:I like breakfast. I like breakfast for dinner, but also American breakfast tends, everything you've described though is more like-
SPEAKER_02:Savory, savory. It's savory. I don't eat the sweet
SPEAKER_00:stuff anymore. American breakfast tends to lean very sweet.
SPEAKER_02:I used to love, like my favorite breakfast, even into adulthood was I'd wander into a McDonald's get the McDonald's big breakfast with their hotcakes and their sausage and their hash brown patty that was like probably-
SPEAKER_00:McDonald's has good hash browns.
SPEAKER_02:10% potato. But you put it all together in a stack and then you cut through and you put lots of the McDonald's syrup on it. And then you make sure that one bite has all of the things. And oh my goodness, so good. So good. So breakfast.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, but what about the full English breakfast that has like the baked beans on the toast?
SPEAKER_02:Breakfast. Baked beans don't belong in breakfast. Done. Period.
SPEAKER_00:Got it.
SPEAKER_02:Question answered. Ever seen a grown man naked?
SPEAKER_00:Yes. Frequently.
SPEAKER_02:Who's the first grown man you saw naked?
SPEAKER_00:Oh, God. Unfortunately, my dad.
SPEAKER_02:Was he golfing?
SPEAKER_00:He wasn't golfing naked. Was
SPEAKER_02:it a mistake thing?
SPEAKER_00:Like you wanted it to the bathroom? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The house that we lived in when I was like three and four had like a carport. So not a garage, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. An open carport. An open carport. Where is this story going? And
SPEAKER_02:then for
SPEAKER_00:some weird reason, there was a shower in the carport.
SPEAKER_02:Of course there was.
SPEAKER_00:Because Florida. There was also a shower in the house. A
SPEAKER_02:shower in the carport? Is that just in case the radiation got you and you've got this decontamination booth with a shower in it?
SPEAKER_00:For whatever reason, I was sitting on... The dryer just out in the carport. My dad was in the shower. I
SPEAKER_02:know why you were
SPEAKER_00:sitting on the dryer. No, no, no, not the washer. I didn't say the washer. The washer is the one that vibrates. I was like four. So bring it all right back in. That's disgusting. Get a hold of yourself. I was waiting for my dad to get out of the shower, but he didn't know I was there. So instead of grabbing a towel and walking out, he just walked out naked and I was sitting on the thing. I couldn't visualize it anymore, but that is the first man that I saw naked. It was upsetting. I didn't like it.
SPEAKER_02:Do they still do the communal shower thing in middle school and high school? Or is that pretty much not
SPEAKER_00:a thing that they do anymore? I don't think that's a thing anymore. Was that your first man you saw naked? I
SPEAKER_02:don't know if it was my first, but it's what I remember the most. And it's very disturbing because... In middle school gym class, you had on display the full spectrum of people going through puberty.
SPEAKER_00:It was like hair, no hair. So you
SPEAKER_02:had little boys, and then you basically had 40-year-old men. Very strange... traumatizing experience.
SPEAKER_00:No, and I didn't. I had PE in high school and I had it first period, but I did not shower. I was just like, I'm going to put on some extra janitor and move about my day because this is not a thing I'm going to do at this school.
SPEAKER_02:Yes. Next question. Sweet potato fries. Is the boom over?
SPEAKER_00:The boom was over before it started. Here's the problem with sweet potato fries. I never liked them. You cannot... get them crispy enough. If you could get them crispy enough, then yes, that would be great because with a honey mustard or some sort of dipping sauce would be lovely, but you can't. They get soggy. The end.
SPEAKER_02:I never understood the attraction to sweet potatoes in general, because I know that some people love them. But to me, it's the equivalent of people saying that they love snow, they love cold weather, but how they love cold weather is from inside the ski lodge. Sweet potatoes.
SPEAKER_00:What are you inside of when you love sweet potatoes?
SPEAKER_02:No, but sweet potatoes, like people love them, but then they got to load it up with butter. They got to load it up with cinnamon. Some of them have marshmallows on them, honey, some of them. It's like, Oh, I love all of the things. It's like people who love coffee and put all the shit in the coffee. Now, I love black coffee.
SPEAKER_00:I am a real man.
SPEAKER_02:But people, extra medium man, but people who put all the stuff on the things, they don't enjoy the original thing. They just don't.
SPEAKER_00:My mom loved sweet potatoes and she would just put butter on it.
SPEAKER_02:So
SPEAKER_00:she did. So
SPEAKER_02:that's honest, but she's then one of the few. But anyway, don't like sweet potatoes, never like sweet potato fries.
SPEAKER_00:All right, you know who loves sweet potatoes more than anybody? Babies. Because it's one of the things that you give them in the jars, and they love it because it's like the first food that they're eating. So like, well, this tastes better than whatever you've been giving me. And the 15-year-old, when she was little, we had this digital camera that would do this thing where it would isolate one color.
SPEAKER_02:Yes, yes. Now there's an app for that.
SPEAKER_00:Right, but I had a camera that would do it. And so we took her when she was one or almost one to the pumpkin patch and you pointed the digital camera at the pumpkin, isolated just the orange so that there was this black and white baby sitting in the pumpkin patch and all the pumpkins were just orange except for her nose, her cheeks and her ears turned orange in the picture because she had so much beta carotene from the sweet potatoes she ate as an infant. Oh,
SPEAKER_02:that's amazing. Well, did that do her any harm? Or did it just look weird in that
SPEAKER_00:picture? It just looked weird in that picture. But yeah, look at a baby the next time. They look a little bit orange because of the carrots and the sweet potatoes.
SPEAKER_02:Wow. Next. Why hasn't there ever been a movie about a really successful dentist who just goes
SPEAKER_00:about his business? I actually appreciate this question. I don't really care about dentists. I have worked through my trauma over dentists and I'm actually, I got a great dentist and I'm fine. But I actually really have thought a lot about this. I just want a movie in which there is no, no, what's the thing?
SPEAKER_02:Conflict?
SPEAKER_00:That's the word I'm looking for. There's no conflict. It's just people are happy. This is their life. Reality TV doesn't do that for us. We all need conflict. And I don't want that. I just want to see a slice of life, people being happy. That's what I want.
SPEAKER_02:There are plenty of documentaries that do that.
SPEAKER_00:I don't think so. Everything needs a story arc. Everything has a narrative in which there is conflict and resolution. I just want happy. That's what I want. Now, I don't really care about a dentist being happy. I'm happy for him. But just anybody, rom-coms, just go be happy and funny. I don't need the fake conflict. Just go be happy. I
SPEAKER_02:think there has been a movie that depicted a dentist realistically going about his business the way dentists do. It's called Little Shop of Horrors. Steve Martin does a great job realistically portraying dentists. So check that out. That's my recommendation. Last question. If a Kardashian grew out a mustache, would it become a trend? My answer to that is Rob did and no one cared.
SPEAKER_00:Excellent. I have nothing to add to that.
SPEAKER_02:Thank you, Dan Belson, for contributing to our first listener mailbag. If you have any questions for us, send it to familiarwilsons at gmail.com or slide gently into our DMs.
SPEAKER_00:AWA, ask Wilsons anything. Put that in the subject line.
SPEAKER_02:Bam.
UNKNOWN:Thank you.
SPEAKER_01:No one likes to be told what to do.
SPEAKER_02:And now's the time in our podcast where we tell you what to do. Amanda, tell us what to do.
SPEAKER_00:All right, here's my thing. It's the little things, right? The big things. Not in all
SPEAKER_02:cases.
SPEAKER_00:No, the extra medium things are the things. But right now, little things in life that make us happy. Here's the thing. Go to the craft store. Buy yourself a$5 pack of magnets. There's like 52 magnets in it from Michael's. Get yourself some spider rings or some acorns or some tiny little Christmas ornaments at the Dollar Tree, whatever it is. Get yourself some hot glue and glue the things onto the magnets and stick them onto the refrigerator. I have been gluing spiders on the magnets. There are now 20 spiders on my refrigerator and it has made the five-year-old so happy. It makes me happy. I did this with leaves and acorns. I got real acorns and spray painted them. It's the little things. When you go to go in the refrigerator, it will just make you happy. Listen, the world is a horrible place sometimes, but if you have a spider on your refrigerator and it's happy to see you when you go to get your coffee or or whatever it is, if you don't drink black coffee like Josh, then you will be happy too.
SPEAKER_02:Can we do little mosquitoes?
SPEAKER_00:No, I don't like the mosquitoes. We can do love bugs.
SPEAKER_02:So there you go. That's our suggestion, our recommendation for the day.
SPEAKER_00:That's right. Make yourself happy.
SPEAKER_02:And when you say make yourself happy, what are we talking about here? By
SPEAKER_00:getting some magnets and smiling at them, not whatever you were doing to the microphone earlier. This is a weird episode.
SPEAKER_02:Do you not like it?
SPEAKER_00:I like it, but this is what happens when we let Dan Belson take over our episodes. We took about anal sex and McDonald's breakfast all in one episode. I have whiplash. I have emotional whiplash from this episode. Are you going to just let me keep talking?
SPEAKER_02:All right, Amanda, that's all there is. There is no more.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, thank the Lord. Thanks for sticking with us, friends.
SPEAKER_02:So we will be back next week with some such nonsense. I think we're going to talk about creativity and sparking creativity next week. I think that that might be our subject. Go ahead and bump on over to Patreon. We have a Patreon and we have loyal listeners who are supporting us. We're so grateful for them. And we would like for you also to be one of them. Hey, Bye. Bye. Bye. I mean. Apparently we put anything in this show. But music, extra songs, extra bits of interviews, all that fun stuff. So go to the Patreon website and look for Super Familiar with the Wilsons and go ahead and join on up. We'd love to see you there. Oh, and also occasionally I send stuff to people. That's also a thing.
SPEAKER_00:That's true. Things just might show up in your mailbox.
SPEAKER_02:Until next week. Go enjoy yourself some breakfast. Get yourself some magnets.
SPEAKER_00:That's right.
SPEAKER_02:And just be careful where you put the magnets.
SPEAKER_00:Go be nice. Bye
SPEAKER_02:now.
SPEAKER_00:Bye.
SPEAKER_02:We hope to see you next week. Meanwhile, subscribe to our podcast. Tell your friends. See you soon. Is this meant to be missed out fire? I don't know, man. It's pretty bad. That's all I got. See ya.
