When Kids Snitch, Empty Easter Eggs, The Self Check Out Line

Easter weekend chaos and a last-minute Walmart run, the psychology of self check out while avoiding human interaction, honesty, loyalty, and why kids snitch, why dogs “mark” everything, a Gainesville restaurant review for Bingo Deli and Pub at South Main Station, Flashbacks timeline game, and listener feedback. 

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Music by Ricky Kendall, Chris Barron, AJCW, and Josh Wilson

Super Familiar with The Wilsons 
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Contact us! familiarwilsons@gmail.com

A Familiar Wilsons Production

Transcript

Content Warning And Cold Open

Josh 0:00

The following podcast uses words like and and also woo. If you're not into any of that shit, then now's your chance.

SPEAKER_00 0:09

Three, two, one, run. I wanna be super familiar. Don't be stranger.

Easter Plans And A Walmart Run

Amanda 0:32

Welcome to Super Familiar with the Wilsons. I'm Amanda.

Josh 0:35

And I'm Josh, and we're the podcast about marriage 2.0 with kids.

Amanda 0:39

And all the psychbests.

Josh 0:41

Happy Easter for those of you who celebrate, although you won't be hearing this until the day after Easter. But retrospectively, retroactively, retconning the situation. Happy Easter.

Amanda 0:52

Happy Easter.

Josh 0:53

I wonder how many folks out there participated in the tried and true Easter egg hunt.

Amanda 0:59

I went to Walmart this morning because we've decided we're allowing Walmart back into our lives in small spaces just because the economy is awful. And I went this morning because I didn't realize that the three older kids were going to be here for Easter. So I had to run go get them some bunnies so that they'd feel like a part of everything. I can't, that's my mom and me. Everybody has to feel celebrated and welcome. And the amount of people there grabbing the baskets and the last minute candy, I was not the only one.

Josh 1:26

Was it like Black Friday?

Amanda 1:28

It was not. I mean, there was maybe like 10 of us, but it still was like, and I actually knew one of the people. She was a mom of kids I used to teach, but we were just all like, oh, okay, we're gonna do this now.

Josh 1:38

Okay, so did it didn't get all hunger games as what I thought you were gonna say. No. It's interesting. You were telling me about Walmart and how you how did you check out?

Amanda 1:48

I stood in the self-checkout line for a while because I brought my own bags, right? And so I was like, I'll just do this. I stood in the self-checkout line, and people had full grocery carts.

SPEAKER_02 1:57

Yeah.

Amanda 1:58

And they were checking out at the self-checkout, and it was taking forever. And I looked over and the cashier assisted aisles had like one person in each of them. So I went and just walked right up. Now I will say the cashier looked annoyed that I had my own bag and just put everything on top of the thing and I bagged my stuff myself, which is fine. Uh, but they stood there with their arms crossed, kind of judging me while I did it. But it's fine. I'm happy that I didn't have to use plastic bags.

Josh 2:24

I've seen this before where people will choose a long line at self-checkout rather than going through the lanes and have the cashier. And I want to know what's up with this behavior. This is, I think, a big sociological thing. I can just feel it.

Amanda 2:38

So there's this class, an undergrad education class uh at UF the College of Ed. One of your assignments is you go and study crowd behavior.

SPEAKER_02 2:47

Yeah.

Amanda 2:47

And the professor would have them go and like just stand in Target or Walmart or and also elevator behavior too. But it's a thing, like watching people at the checkout line and doing like a sociological kind of data collection. It's a thing. So you should take this class.

Why Self Checkout Wins Anyway

Josh 3:03

I mean, we're we're doing a podcast here for you to say, to take a topic that I bring up and say, why don't you take a class about it? as opposed to us talking about it with these lovely people. Annoying a little bit. But let's talk about this. To me, it's I guess one of three possible explanations. Number one, they saw Jab of the Hutt at the till, and they're like, I'm not gonna mess with her because she's grumpy with her her arms crossed, right? Or it is people are introverts. Yes, that's what I think is more they don't want to deal with it, or it's that people have this weird bias. If I do it, it will be quicker.

Amanda 3:38

Yeah, and it's not because especially I was watching this guy, he had so much produce, and you have to weigh that and like find the label on the scale and do all of this. Cannot be faster. It isn't. Um, I one, I wonder if people are like embarrassed about what they're buying. Like if they don't want the judgment of what they're buying.

Josh 3:58

They can't all be buying rubbers and lube.

Amanda 4:00

Okay. Well, there's that. Uh one, I think that people just don't want to talk to people, and that's another thing. Or or they have like some some social anxiety or whatever, like you said. I also kind of wonder how many people are skipping like every third item and not scanning it.

Josh 4:19

Oh, that's interesting. But don't they have to? Isn't there like a little weight that you're supposed to set the item?

Amanda 4:26

No, the weight is if you scan it and you don't put it in the bag, then it says like skip bagging or like a CVS does this to CVS does this to me. If you because I always self-check out at CVS, right? If you scan something and then you can say skip bagging, and then the next one, if you scan it and you don't you you don't put it in the bag, it won't let you do two in a row. It makes the the employee come over and and I don't get it because you've already scanned it, so I don't really understand the logic behind that.

Josh 4:57

I'm just saying that yes, I kind of understand this idea of being an introvert, and particularly in some grocery trains where they tell the people to talk like they tell the the people at the till to engage in conversation. It's such a natural conversation. They usually pick something about something that you're purchasing and say something about it. Maybe that's why the people with the rubbers and the lube don't like, oh, small, interesting, hmm. But I do think that there's also this bias where we automatically think we can do anything better, particularly a job that we might consider menial, which I don't consider any job menial, but I could very easily imagine someone saying, Oh, checking, you know, working at the register, easiest thing. I can do that. So in their mind, they're saving time because once I get up there, I'm gonna do it quickly.

SPEAKER_02 5:47

Yeah, but you're waiting in a long ass.

Josh 5:48

But also you don't do it quicker and faster. Because I can't tell you how many times I fumble around like a fucking idiot looking for the the code to scan. And then the the people obviously at the register, they're just like doot doot doot. Easiest thing for them because they know how to do it. I also don't like the pressure of like okay, now you're up at the self-checkout. You better get done as quickly as possible because you got all these assholes breathing down your neck. Yes. Don't prefer that. And you know what? I don't mind the conversation, particularly if the person is any sort of good mood. I mean, that that's injecting some awkward positivity in your life that you wouldn't, you know. That's why I like being out in public spaces because of the people. So yeah.

Amanda 6:29

I I was checking out at Publix yesterday and had a conversation with the cashier was a young, a young kid. I mean, I think they have to be at least 18 to be a cashier because they can't scan alcohol. So he said, How are you? and how's your day? Whatever. It always throws me when they say, Do you have plans for the day? Because sometimes they'll ask me at like four o'clock. And I'm like, No, I go to bed at like seven. I don't know what how much plan time you think I have left in this.

Josh 6:54

I think these people at the register should be careful asking someone what are your plans for the day. Because what if the person says, I'm not doing anything, what are you doing? Right. Let's go.

Amanda 7:02

Yeah. Well, so then I asked him if it was busy for Easter, and he said, Oh, yeah, just you know, really steady. And I said, Well, that's good. It makes the time go by because I am my father's child. I can talk to anyone as you well know.

Josh 7:14

Depending on, you know, what's happening in your life.

Amanda 7:17

That's right.

Josh 7:17

What various hormones are racing through down the hallways of your bloodstream.

Amanda 7:22

If I'm feeling like stable, I can talk to anyone. And then he started telling me, yes, but I only have an hour and a half left until my break. But then I don't live near here, so I I work 10 to 10. I got very confused. Then all of a sudden we were talking about where he lived, and then I just the whole thing, I it I got really confused.

Josh 7:41

What if that's where the checkers are testing out their pickup lines? Like it's just RD for them. They know that that they're you know, and they're not interested either, but it's just like practice for them.

Amanda 7:51

Well, that's good for them then if they get the practice.

Josh 7:54

I just think it's interesting how humans would rather struggle alone than efficiently interact, you know.

Zipper Merging And The Introvert Tax

Amanda 7:59

Or ask for help.

Josh 8:00

Or ask for help, but efficiently interact because you see this all the time when people are driving. And if jackasses would just drive the speed limit, especially we're talking about now when you need to merge lanes when it's going from like three lanes to two lanes, and if you do the zipper system where every other car goes from each lane, so much faster, so much faster and more efficient. But there is no way, it's just it is physically impossible for that to happen in this universe, in this timeline, ain't gonna happen.

Amanda 8:31

Because everybody is just at what my needs are the most important. I've seen these bumper stickers that say, Please let me merge or I'll cry, or like bestie, let me merge. I mean, like, and I will let those children merge because I know it's stressful, it's hard. I don't like it. And if I see people like being kind and polite in their driving, I am much more willing to let them in than the people who like will just skip the whole line, go up to the front. I'm not letting you in.

Josh 8:58

Well, I'm from Miami, so I I have a bachelor's degree in not letting people in. It's it's a thing. I just think that self-checkout at the end of the day, I think it's less efficient. And I really what you're doing is it's an introvert tax. It's taxing your time, it's it's making it longer because you're going out of your way to do something by yourself. And that's anything in society where you could benefit from teamwork if from collaboration, and you're just like, fuck it, I'm gonna do it myself. Introvert tax right there. But we had started talking about Easter, which is what I originally wanted to do.

Empty Eggs And Neighbor Kid Rules

Amanda 9:30

Well, then I went to Walmart.

Josh 9:31

I know. And we have a situation that could potentially turn into a problem because in a wee few hours we are gonna have an Easter egg hunt outside in our neighborhood. We have a green space in the back where all of the houses on both sides back up to so all the garage doors open into an alley, and then beyond the alley is a green space. We will sprinkle, we will throw, we will chuck eggs all over this green space for our children and the neighbors' children.

Amanda 10:01

Not all of the neighbors' children.

Josh 10:02

No, no, no. But this is the this is the crux of our problem with a a set of neighbors there too. That we like because yes, that we like. By the way, are we sure that any of our other neighbors don't listen to this podcast? Because that would be awkward. Anyway, let me keep going.

Amanda 10:17

I mean, we're not wrong.

Josh 10:18

Okay, so the other neighbors that we have in the neighborhood, by and large, they ignore us, right? And it's a little bit of an awkward situation because we we'd like to be friends with everyone. We would like to all run around dressed in our uniform costumes, farting sparkles out of our ass. We would like to do this.

Amanda 10:38

I don't want to do that.

Josh 10:39

We don't, we can't. We haven't been able to break through, and so now I've kind of stopped trying. But we're gonna have this this Easter parade happening here, this Easter egg hunt in our back green space. I guarantee you, some other children from the other neighbors are gonna come out and want to participate or may wander over and pick up an egg or something. What are we gonna do about it?

Amanda 11:01

Well, here's here's the go ahead because the eggs are empty.

Josh 11:05

What?

Amanda 11:06

Winthrop decided that we needed to not fill the eggs. So Winthrop made this role. So we're having the egg hunt with neighbor Kate and Tony and their kids. We decided that we would not fill the eggs because at Winthrop's school for their Easter egg hunt, they they go and find the eggs and they have X amount of eggs they can find, and then they bring them back and turn them in for a candy bag.

SPEAKER_02 11:29

Right.

Amanda 11:29

So we decided this was a good idea. We have like a hundred empty eggs that are here that the big kids are gonna go hide. And then when the three younger ones find it, they come back. I went over to neighbor Kate's last night. We made candy bags for the three younger children. It will last them until Halloween. I am certain it's a lot of candy. Because Kate and I kept thinking we didn't have candy and kept finding candy that we had bought and forgot about because perimenopause. And so there will be the neighbor children are welcome to come pick up an egg. There's nothing in it. You know what I'm gonna tell them is in it when they ask what's in it? What? The Holy Ghost for Easter.

Josh 12:08

That's not no, that's that's the Holy Ghost isn't the major player in the Easter story.

Amanda 12:13

Well, I mean, I'm not buying baby Jesus's, that's Christmas and Mardi Gras. And so I what am I gonna buy? Crucifixes, that's terrifying. So Muffy was so mad the other day. She got in the car when um I picked her up from school to bring her home for the weekend. And she said, We were talking about Easter, and she said, Oh, I was on campus today, and there was this girl passing out Easter eggs, plastic Easter eggs, and she's like, Do you want an Easter egg? And I thought, yeah, I could really eat some candy. And she opened it up and it was just a Bible verse.

Josh 12:43

Oh no.

Amanda 12:44

I was like, at least put candy with the Bible verse. Oh, the Christians now you've just annoyed people.

Josh 12:49

The Christians are appropriating Easter. What can you do there?

Amanda 12:52

I know. I think they think it's theirs.

Sidewalk Chalk And Family Snitching

Josh 12:54

Speaking of the neighbors, we have an issue. We have a situation with Winthrop that has not, in my mind, been resolved.

Amanda 13:00

I think that you were making a much bigger deal out of this than it is.

Josh 13:04

We had the neighbor children over last week and they got some sidewalk chalk and they drew pictures and wrote stuff in our driveway. And it was very cute, and I love that. I love when they do that, by the way. The Easter bunny that I want them to cover the entire uh driveway with chalk. So we're gonna have to buy a big ass load of chalk because I want the whole thing to be covered. Anyway, a couple days later, I was out there with Winthrop. We were playing Too Square, and I I went and got the broom to get rid of some leaves, and I was like, hmm, I wonder if this chalk will sweep up. I wonder what it'll look like. So I swept some up. He looked at it and said, Why are you doing that? I said, Well, the rain's gonna wash away anyway, and and I'm not like trying to hurt anyone's feelings. I was just curious what would happen if I swept this chalk. In my mind, it's done. The next day we have those same children over to play, and we're all the parents are all sitting outside, and Winthrop and the children are on the driveway playing. And the first thing he does is he goes over and it was a drawing of a lemon that I had erased. He goes over to that and he says, Look what my dad did to your drawing.

Amanda 14:09

He told on you.

Josh 14:11

What a grass.

Amanda 14:14

And then that child came up to you and just stared at you.

Josh 14:19

Wait.

Amanda 14:20

I mean, I would have done the same thing. And you took a big thing. I would have at his age, a hundred percent. I would have. I was the kid that got in the car. My brother would pick me up from school because he was older than me, could drive. I would get in the car and he'd be listening to what we would call secular music, not the Christian radio station. And as soon as we got home, I walked straight in the door and told mom, Tim was listening to secular music in the car, not WCIE where Jesus Christ is everything. I would have 100% told on you for sweeping up the lemon. And you took a poll of the two older boys and they said they would have done it too.

Josh 14:56

No, Andrew would not have done it.

Amanda 14:59

No, I was there. Andrew said he thinks maybe he would have, maybe he wouldn't have. Like he backed up a little bit on it. Maybe I wouldn't have. Daniel would have.

Josh 15:06

Well, I was about to say that this isn't the Wilson way, but apparently it is.

Amanda 15:11

Yeah.

Josh 15:11

Because overwhelmingly, I've got a family full of rats.

Amanda 15:17

Well, maybe stop messing up people's stuff.

Josh 15:20

I I mean, it wasn't done. No, wait. No, I'm not gonna defend myself. Do not snitch on your family. This is a thing that we need to ingrain in our children. Do not snitch on your family. We're going to a Sopranos party next week. Behavior like that would not be acceptable in this in the Sopranos family.

Amanda 15:38

What am I supposed to wear to a Sopranos?

Josh 15:40

Don't change the subject because you're embarrassed by your behavior.

Amanda 15:42

I'm not embarrassed by my behavior.

Josh 15:44

I know you should be. Anyway, parents out there, are your children little snitches? Let us know. Familiar Wilsons with an S. FamiliarWilsons at gmail.com.

Amanda 15:54

That S stands for snitch.

Josh 15:56

Apparently it does. Damn it. But even the dog is a snitch. We know that the dog is a snitch because he barks at everything. He tells on everyone.

Amanda 16:06

Do you think that see? I think when he's sitting upstairs on the red chair looking out the window and barking, I think he's telling people to leave the house alone. But do you think he's like just really complaining about us?

Dog Marking Yelp Reviews And QR Codes

Josh 16:16

He's telling on someone. He's either telling on us or he's telling on the people outside. I mean, he's doing something. I don't like it. I'm already annoyed at him because I took him on a walk this morning, and I've been taking him on longer walks because I know that it's healthy for him. And he'll stop and he'll smell this or that. And that's like sensory engagement for him. Really good for him cognitively. And he's an old pup at this point. So I take him on a long walk. I noticed something this morning, or I won't say that I noticed it because he does it all the time. I just thought about it a little bit more. It annoys me that when we first go out in the morning, he will have just a big long we, right? Just right in the grass in front of our house. Then we'll go for a walk, and he has saved up enough. Yes, no fewer than five or six times today, stop and leave his mark on screen.

Amanda 17:06

Oh, you know, he's marking. It's definitely three houses down because they have a golden doodle, and he is not about that dog, and so he likes to pee in their yard.

Josh 17:14

I've never, when I'm upstairs in the morning peeing, do I say I need to hold some back and set in in case I see something really, really cool that I want to pee on. It's not a thing, it's not a thing for me.

Amanda 17:27

That I'm I'm glad for you. I could be the dog, but not because I'm saving it up for marking, but because apparently one of the things with perimenopause is that you you feel like you're pregnant again and just have to pee all the time. So that's a thing. Well, I could walk 10 feet and probably have to pee again.

Josh 17:43

This is why I will not go on walks with you. I did look it up, and research on canine behavior shows that urine contains chemical information on sex, health, dominance, etc. And so really they are marking it so that other dogs can happen upon this scent and then receive information about that dog. So clearly, as soon as the dog species evolves and develops business cards, they will have no more need for this behavior.

Amanda 18:11

They're leaving their calling card. That's what it is. People used to leave calling cards. Okay, but you say information about sex. Do you mean like male-female dog, or do you mean like whether they're active or not?

Josh 18:21

Probably both.

Amanda 18:22

Because this this one's never had it ever. Yes. I mean, we took that away from him at their young age.

Josh 18:28

Probably all of that. Dogs have an extremely sensitive sense of smell. So, um, so there you go. I think with humans, what we do, because business cards aren't a thing anymore. If we want to leave our mark on something, we leave a Yelp review.

Amanda 18:41

Yes.

Josh 18:41

You know that that's that's our peeing on, and you know, usually it is peeing. If we if you're compelled to leave a Yelp review, it's usually gonna be negative. Right. Maybe you're peeing on it and shitting on it. Who knows?

Amanda 18:53

Yelp reviews are either like this was the best thing that ever happened to me, or this was horrible. There's never just the this was fine, like you can never just find the reviews for it's fine.

Josh 19:02

Right, because there's no passion in that. You know, just if you're gonna take the time to leave an online review, there's gotta be passion behind it. So it's either exceptional or it's crap.

Amanda 19:11

But I want to know the just fine because that's something that I would do on my daily basis. Is this grocery store just fine? That's great. Then I don't I'm not expecting any kind of drama one way or the other. It's just fine.

Josh 19:22

I feel like if you look on Yelp Reviews to a grocery store that you know is very active and you see like seven reviews, then there's your just fine.

Amanda 19:32

Okay.

Josh 19:32

That's most people they're not bothered enough to want to pee on it, but they're not excited enough to want to tell anyone else about it. It's another guilty pleasure. Is this grocery store?

Amanda 19:43

So uh now when I go to conferences and things and people aren't giving out business cards anymore, you know what they're doing?

Josh 19:51

They're peeing on you?

Amanda 19:52

No, they walk out, they have their QR code and they're wearing it in some way, and then you just scan it, and then you have all their information. And they can add like all the papers they've published and like all this stuff. This is the thing though.

Josh 20:04

I think I just want to have a random QR code. I think I'm gonna get a t-shirt with a QR code on it, and it just leads to utter abject nonsense. Okay, or like just a picture that I change every week. I curate a picture, every week it's different. That's an idea there.

Amanda 20:19

It is because you could link it to your art stuff.

Josh 20:22

No, no, no, no, no, no. I want this to have no other agenda but just to make people feel slightly like strange, like a little unnerved. You know what I'm saying? I scanned this picture, I went to a picture of an empty Easter egg. You know, just something really weird and slightly disturbing. That's what I wanted.

Amanda 20:38

No, they would come up with some sort of allegory for the empty tomb.

Josh 20:40

Yeah, yeah, okay. We're not doing that.

Amanda 20:42

People find narrative everywhere that they do.

Josh 20:46

Puts the self in self-righteous, the suffer in insufferable bono, bono, monozanob. I have a complaint, I have a problem, and I want to register it with someone, so I guess I'm gonna register it with you.

Amanda 21:16

Is it within my power to fix this?

Josh 21:18

Probably.

Amanda 21:19

Okay.

Fix Walk Like An Egyptian

Josh 21:19

I have a problem with the song Walk Like an Egyptian.

Amanda 21:22

I mean, well, first of all, it's I think borderline racist.

Josh 21:26

Okay, you would think that that would be my problem, the perpetuation of at least a very weird stereotype that doesn't exist. Um, but that's not my problem. My problem is the fact that we have to wait through the whole damn song to get to the good singer. Susanna Hoffs takes the third verse, the other two nameless drones that do the first and the second verse. Third verse is Susanna Hoffs, and she kicks in, and you're like, Oh, this lady can sing. Why would you wait?

Amanda 21:57

Why would you not lead with your why would you not lead with it?

Josh 22:00

The hook, why would you not lead with the best singer or have the best singer sing right throughout? I bet what happened was they were doing the song, they're like, This song is the most ridiculous, stereotypical, racist song. It's not gonna do well. Let's just screw around with how we have you know our people singing or something. Otherwise, makes no sense.

Amanda 22:18

Well, okay, but so here's my question for you. Oh god, perimenopause brain in action. I just had it in my head right away. No, not my question. Okay, we're back. Um, it's wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Josh 22:29

What just happened next?

Amanda 22:30

What just happened is words fell out of my brain. It's a thing that happens. Words just fall out of your brain during perimenopause. It's terrifying. Okay. I'm gonna go on lithium. I've found this this apparently low doses of lithium help with cognitive um health. So I'm gonna go on lithium now. Remember when they used to send women to the seashores and give them lithium when they were having the menopause? Can we do that again?

Josh 22:51

What do you mean, remember when? I don't think I was alive at that time.

Amanda 22:54

No, right, but we were just aware that like in the early 1900s, this was a thing that happened. Anyway.

Josh 22:59

You know, this podcast, perfect example of that song because we are in minute number 23, and you're just now mentioning paramenopause. That's like waiting for Susannah Hoff's in the third verse. Imagine a if we were to sit down and do a podcast and you didn't speak until minute 18.

Amanda 23:18

Sometimes you get really mad and you start going on rants, and I don't get a chance to speak until minute 18.

Josh 23:22

Which very rarely happens, my friend. I'm just saying it would make no sense. It makes no sense for this song. This is all I'm saying to you.

Amanda 23:28

Well, what I'm saying is it's like eating your vegetables first, though. That's what they did. You get you they were obligated to have the two other people sing. Might as well have them, like, you know, so that you've got the reward of the dessert later or the protein that you really like or the mac and cheese or whatever. You eat the broccoli and the beets first so that you can have the yummy food last.

Josh 23:49

Okay, so that analogy only works when we're talking about children because I'm a grown-ass man, and if I don't want to eat the vegetables, I'm not eating them first, in the middle, or last.

Amanda 23:59

You don't eat them.

Josh 24:00

This is what I'm saying to you. I have matcha in the morning.

Amanda 24:03

That's a grass.

Josh 24:05

Grass. Winthrop is a grass, by the way. Thanks for reminding me that.

Amanda 24:09

I've never heard that term ever until you started using it.

Josh 24:12

Yeah, well, a snitch, a rat.

Amanda 24:14

But where did this word grass come from?

Josh 24:17

It is a UK slang phrase.

Amanda 24:18

Okay, well, all right.

Josh 24:20

Have we fixed uh walk like an Egyptian? I don't think we have. I feel like you've distracted me with parametopause.

Amanda 24:26

How am I supposed to fix it? The song's like 40 years old.

Josh 24:28

Can we write someone? Can we send an email? Can I send a QR code to someone?

unknown 24:33

Yes.

Josh 24:35

All right, people, I know that you're listening because we have trillions of listeners at this point. People who are responsible for Walk Like an Egyptian. I don't know who you are, but you know who you are. Fix the damn song. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 24:49

Um super familiar with you today.

Gainesville Food Review Bingo Deli

Josh 24:57

It's time for a Gainesville restaurant review. Amanda, are you ready to review a restaurant in Gainesville?

Amanda 25:04

Yes, because I live in Gainesville and I eat at restaurants.

Josh 25:07

We went to the Bingo Deli and pub downtown in the South Main area.

Amanda 25:12

South Main station.

Josh 25:13

Yeah, and I really, really enjoyed it. We've been there before, but this time I was actually paying attention because a lot of times I just kind of aimlessly wander through life not knowing what's happening. But I really, really enjoy it. It's very, how would you describe it? Very rustic.

Amanda 25:28

I I don't know how to describe it. I like it. It looks like like there are church benches for some of the table benches. It's very eclectic. It rustic, I think, is a decent enough word for it.

Josh 25:40

It's like a cross between a college dive bar and a deli.

Amanda 25:43

But it's clean.

Josh 25:44

But it's clean.

Amanda 25:45

And it's it's a little bit more upscale. It is counter service, like you order the counter, but they deliver it to you. But it's a little bit like more upscale. Winthrop really wanted a cheeseburger. And the place that we were gonna go get a cheeseburger, there was zero parking available. So we went there and he and I shared what was basically a cheesesteak sandwich, but like the best one I've ever had. Yeah. Like so good. And um, I was really secretly hoping he wasn't gonna want it, and I ordered him a grilled cheese, and he still ate the whole entire grilled cheese and half of my cheesesteak sandwich. So that's fine. Uh, but really good. And and and a cute little place. There's there's a pizza place, there's a coffee shop, there's an independent bookstore, there's a music venue. So South Main Station in and of itself just very cute.

Josh 26:29

I had a a shrimp hoagie, I guess. They call it a shrimp roll. I don't think that that's what it was, but it was a giant overstuffed sandwich. Very, very good. Yours was very good as well. Food is good. It is one of those places, and this might be part of my rating system now. Using a scale from one to five, one of the things I want to rate things on is would you stay here too long? Would you stay in this restaurant and just sit and hang out? Would you stay too much? Would you stay long enough for the people who work there saying we need the table?

Amanda 26:59

Do we have kids with us or not have kids with us?

Josh 27:02

Well, Winthrop was occupied at that point. He was happy, and I would have happily just sat there, art on the walls, eclectic, this and that, a lot of wood. Um, because I think that originally that was a train station.

Amanda 27:14

South Main Station.

Josh 27:15

That might give you an idea of what it looked like on the inside, like an old timey train station, not like Amtrak or whatever. Um, very good. So I recommend Bingo Deli and Pub, Downtown Gainesville, South Main Station. Go check it out. And then when you do, email us at familiarwilsons at gmail.com. That's familiarwilsons with an S that stands for snitch.com.

Amanda 27:58

All right, that music by AJCW means it is game time, and we have not done a flashbacks in a while, and I think this flashback might be a little bit Easter themed. We will see. At least the first one is Easter themed. So the conceit of this game is I'm gonna give Josh eight events that happen in history, and he's gotta put them in the correct order on a timeline. So, Josh, the first one, the New York Times gives me the year, but we're all we always let you guess, and you get a point if you get it right on the timeline, and then if you like get within, let's say five years either way, I'm gonna give you two points.

Josh 28:32

Oh, this is already way too complicated, but go ahead.

Amanda 28:35

Okay, Robert Strohecker, that's a name, makes a five-foot-tall chocolate rabbit. It helps popularize candy Easter bunnies. That's right.

Josh 28:45

Okay, this is gonna be in the 1800s, so this is gonna be like 1850.

Amanda 28:51

1890.

Josh 28:52

Bam!

Amanda 28:53

So you get one point for that.

Josh 28:55

1890, okay.

Amanda 28:57

All right, moving back along to your friends, the ancient Egyptians.

Josh 29:01

Oh, you just gave me a clue here.

Amanda 29:03

Ancient Egyptians are among the first to create a sweet confection that mixes nuts and honey with the sap of swamp plants, which are known as marshmallows.

Josh 29:14

Oh, no.

Amanda 29:15

I have no idea. That's really cool.

Josh 29:17

Marshmallows with nuts and honey.

Amanda 29:19

This is why we play this game. We learn things. Yeah. So before or after 1890.

Josh 29:24

Well, I'm gonna go ahead and give myself that point. Is before 1890, and I have no freaking idea. Let's say that it is uh 200 BCE.

Amanda 29:34

2000 BCE.

Josh 29:36

Oh, why did you guess?

Amanda 29:37

Because I thought you got it right for a second, and then I saw the extra. I was like, damn. No, it's circa 2000 BCE. So that's one more point for you. Two points.

Josh 29:45

All right, go ahead.

Amanda 29:46

A Stanford psychologist, Walter Michel, gives preschoolers a choice: one marshmallow now or two later. In the test, most kids eat one marshmallow right away. This is the delayed gratification test.

Josh 30:00

Delayed gratification, kind of like that Bengals song, Walk Like an Egyptian, and also the delayed gratification that you get when I constantly stop the podcast and I go back and I re-record something I've said because I can't say the damn word.

Amanda 30:16

Seven times, and you just said a word wrong there, but we're not going back. Let's go. Listen a Stanford psychologist, Walter Michel, gives preschoolers a choice.

Josh 30:25

All right, that it that feels like it is like the 1950s.

Amanda 30:29

All right, so definitely after the five-foot-tall chocolate rabbit.

Josh 30:32

Yep.

Amanda 30:33

Uh, you are correct. It is circa 1970.

Josh 30:37

Oh, okay.

Amanda 30:38

So you're still doing really well.

Josh 30:41

I feel like from the the 60s to the 70s, maybe the 50s to the 70s, they did a bunch of experiments on people and children that they would never dare do today. Oh, yeah. Yes, no. Yeah, yeah.

Amanda 30:53

It's not good. Willem Jansoon, a Dutch explorer, is the first European to land in Australia. Not finding gold or spices, he leaves nothing, he sees nothing of value and promptly leaves.

Josh 31:08

Okay. We're gonna go with when did the UK have like their rapid expansion and conquering Australia?

Amanda 31:14

See, but this guy is Dutch.

Josh 31:15

Oh, Dutch. I see, I wasn't listening, I was writing something down. Dutch now? Yes.

Amanda 31:19

Um He's wearing a frilly collar if that helps you.

Josh 31:22

Oh, it does, it does. Let's say that 1860.

Amanda 31:26

You don't think anybody was in Australia before 1860?

Josh 31:29

Shit. Let's say then 1600.

Amanda 31:32

Okay, so be after the ancient Egyptians, before the tall chocolate. Yes. 1606! You get two points!

Josh 31:39

1606. I I'm gonna take the two points, but I shouldn't because you had to remind me of it.

Amanda 31:44

Are you counting your points?

Josh 31:45

I am, yeah, five so far.

Amanda 31:47

Good. All right, in New York City, Mayor, oh god, Fiorello LaGuardia. LaGuardia, yeah, bans penball, decrying it as gambling. Flippers are later added to machines, making them games of skill instead of just luck. Wait, we didn't have flippers before?

Josh 32:03

Yeah, no.

Amanda 32:04

So it was gambling until we got the we could actually control some of this. Okay.

Josh 32:08

Kind of like life.

Amanda 32:09

Yes.

Josh 32:09

Let's say I don't know when LaGuardia was, so let's just say 1955.

Amanda 32:16

So bef after chocolate before the delayed gratification.

Josh 32:20

Yes.

Amanda 32:20

1942. Oh, you're not within 10, though. Or with five either way. Right. Yeah. Okay. But good. All right. Amelia Earhart and Eleanor Roosevelt slip away from a White House event. The two find an airplane and take a joyride to Baltimore.

Josh 32:36

I'm gonna say 1937.

Amanda 32:41

All right. 1933! You get your two extra points. The Art of War is written, credited to Sun Tzu, a Chinese general. The book says that the most skillful act is to subdue the enemy without fighting at all. I wish people still listened.

Josh 32:58

Uh, we're gonna say. Um, I have no frickin' idea. So I think that it is after the Egyptians, okay, but before Australia. Before Australia. I can't even hazard a guess.

Amanda 33:17

450 BCE. So you are correct.

Josh 33:21

Okay, thank you. I'll write that down and I'll always remember that for the rest of my life.

Amanda 33:24

Two more, ready?

Josh 33:25

Yep.

Amanda 33:26

Herman Rorschach, the son of a Swiss painter, dabbles in the fine arts. Influenced by Carl Jung, he creates a psychological assessment, the inkblot test. I did not know that his his father was a painter.

Josh 33:40

The inkblot test. Um, that's gonna feel like I'm gonna get this wrong. That is like 1930s.

Amanda 33:47

Okay, before or after Amelia Earhart.

Josh 33:50

Oh, oh crap. Uh okay, there's not enough space between Earhart and LaGuardia for me to feel comfortable putting it there.

Amanda 33:59

Okay.

Josh 33:59

So let's put it between chocolate and Earhart.

Amanda 34:04

All right.

Josh 34:04

So let's say 1907.

Amanda 34:07

1921. So you still got it right on the timeline. So you are still you're seven for seven. All right, last one, ready?

Josh 34:15

I have ten points.

Amanda 34:16

By using latex from rubber trees and Mesoamerica, the old what's wrong with you? Why is red on your microphone?

Josh 34:27

Go ahead.

Amanda 34:28

The old Mechs begin to build early versions of elastic bands, rubber sole shoes, and even bouncy balls.

Josh 34:36

I have zero concept. I'm gonna pick the biggest space and and um go inside that.

Amanda 34:46

So between the ancient Egyptians and the art of war?

Josh 34:49

No, between Australia and and Charlotte. And also, thank you for not calling me out for saying that I'm gonna take the biggest space and go inside that.

Amanda 34:59

Um, I what uh I don't even think about sex anymore. Um Paramenopause, I love you. Um also big spaces don't I don't identify with that. Okay, wait, where? Charlotte? What is I where is Charlotte?

Josh 35:14

Chocolate. I can't read my own writing.

Amanda 35:16

Okay. Oh no, 1600 BCE. You would have been right if you would have gone with what I said.

Josh 35:23

Damn it to hell.

The Good List And Candy Bunny Horror

Amanda 35:26

All right, so really quickly, uh, these are the reasons why some of these are in this week. Um, the ancient Egyptians, it's because after a backlash, Hershey's promise to focus on natural ingredients and real chocolate in its desserts. And then um the Easter bunnies is because chocolate bunnies are being created now with some extra personalities. So let's see, we've got um some with baby bunnies inside of them. Um, some of them have like dried nuts and stuff in them. So people are going a little bit crazy on the Easter bunnies, but the one that I really want to leave everybody with is the uh good list. So this is the Amelia Earhart and Eleanor Roosevelt um going on a joy ride. So there are the New York Times does something called the good list. It's seven things to add some delight to your day. It's just a little newsletter, and so it tells like just happy things. This reminds me of when I used to like Oprah's good things, or no, not Oprah didn't do the good things. Martha Stewart did the good things. But this is just happy things for your day. It'll come to your inbox. So try the good list. Seven things to add some delight to your day. And let's just go ahead and say that is my recommendation. So you got seven out of eight?

Josh 36:45

Yeah, I got ten points using our system, but I need to tell you right now that there is nothing more horrifying, I don't care if it's chocolate, than biting into something and finding a baby version of that something in it. Biting into a chocolate rabbit and finding a baby bunny inside the chocolate rabbit's uterus, not a thing that I want to do.

Amanda 37:08

It will kill you.

Josh 37:09

Not a thing that I just so gross. I'm so grossed out canceling Easter for next year just because of that.

Listener Feedback And Malicious Compliance

SPEAKER_00 37:15

All right. Email.

Josh 37:17

We have some listener feedback. Remember, if you want to let us know what you think of what we're saying, uh, even if you don't think much about what we're saying. Good thing we're not on Yelp, right? Yes. Um, send us an email at familiarwilsons with an s at gmail.com. Listener Matt wishes to opine on what we talked about last week, where you used the term my love disparagingly towards me.

Amanda 37:42

No, no, no, no. No. The words that came before my love were disparaging. I was just identifying you with my love.

Josh 37:53

If you want to know what we're talking about, listen to last week's episode. He says, instead of my love, we operate on starting the insult, stopping, and then engaging in malicious compliance. In other words, what the fu honey, what do you mean by that? Or that is stup Uh uh what did you say you wanted for dinner? So, Amanda, what do you think about that being our new system?

Amanda 38:18

Um, I don't want to have to stop and edit myself. Because I won't remember, and then I'll just say that's stupid, and then you'll get mad. Like, I won't remember.

Josh 38:31

I didn't know that you were that high on the cognitively impaired scale.

Amanda 38:36

Listen, perimenopause is taking me down.

Love Languages Gifts Touch And Tears

Josh 38:40

Look out, got to the dropper. Okay, so if you want to let us know what you think, familiarwilsons at gmail.com.

Amanda 38:48

I also just got really sad because a really good friend of mine just sent me a text and said, when you realize this is the only basket you're getting for Easter, and it's just a basket of dirty clothes. And I'm sad now because no one gets me baskets. I make sure everybody feels celebrated and no one buys me basketball. And my mom always got me an Easter basket, even I was in college. I always got Easter presents. Nobody gets me Easter presents anymore.

Josh 39:13

Did you give her a basket in return when you were growing up?

Amanda 39:16

No, I just got up and went to church early because she always the the only time she could get me to go to the early service was on Easter and Mother's Day. Because I was not about the early service. Did you go to you had to go because you worked at the church?

Josh 39:28

Yeah, but you're changing the subject. You never got your mom an Easter basket, so this is just the cycle. This is the chain, it's the burden that you carry.

Amanda 39:35

So what you could have said is, honey, I'll make sure you feel celebrated every holiday because you work really hard to making sure that everybody else I'm gonna cry again.

Josh 39:44

I celebrate you all the time.

Amanda 39:46

This fly just landed on my microphone and now I'm distracted. You better be glad that fly is there because I you know what it made me cry when you brought me two drinks from Whole Foods because it was like so kind and you thought of me. Like, this is how low my bar is right now.

Josh 40:02

Well, but we express love in different ways.

Amanda 40:05

I know, but you this is the whole thing though. Like, you want you express love the way you want to be loved. And so your expression of love is physical touch and quality time. Yes, right? Yes, mine is acts of service and gifts, so therefore, we need to be doing like I need to be giving you physical in large holes or spaces or something in quality time, and you need to be doing acts of service and buying me gifts.

Josh 40:33

Okay, it's a deal.

Amanda 40:34

Thank you.

Josh 40:35

We just fit an entire podcast episode in that three minutes right there.

Amanda 40:39

I'm gonna cry again.

Josh 40:40

Don't cry, no more crying. I love you.

Amanda 40:42

I love you too.

Josh 40:49

All right, Amanda, that's all there is. There is no more. What do you think of that mess?

Amanda 40:53

I don't know. I'm still trying not to cry. I have to go set up the Easter baskets for the children now. Oh, my funny. And do freaking laundry.

Josh 41:01

It's not my fault.

Amanda 41:02

You said it's not my funny. What's wrong with you? You're a funny bunny for Easter.

Josh 41:07

Um, all right.

Amanda 41:07

So we want to think tonight. I'll do that. That'll be my poet. Are you coming with me tonight? I've if if Muffy will let me. Okay. She's got a French test to study for.

Thank Yous Egg Sharing And Sign Off

Josh 41:17

Alright, well, she can study for the test. Winter could study for his Minecraft test. Yes. Open book. I would like to thank the following people for just being so wonderful. Justin, Matt, Antonio, Josh Garr, Daniel J. Buckets, Chicken Tom, Monique from Germany, Joey.

SPEAKER_02 41:35

Joey.

Josh 41:35

Ryan Baker, Refined, Gay Jeff, Mark and Rachel, and Dan and Gavin. Thank you all for being so peachy key and wonderful.

Amanda 41:45

You and Dan and Gavin and Mark Plant were on about stuff in the chat today. Do I need to know anything about this?

Josh 41:51

We were talking about what we should do with the eggs, whether we should let the kids come and grab the eggs from the neighborhood or whether we should turn them away.

Amanda 42:00

What did they say?

Josh 42:01

Dan says no eggs for douchebags, and Planty says that you should give kids eggs.

Amanda 42:08

You said you haven't met these kids. Excellent. Good. Alright. Listen, people, go out there and share your eggs and be kind.

Josh 42:18

Share your eggs. Do you get money for selling your eggs?

Amanda 42:21

Yeah, you do.

Josh 42:22

Can you? Yeah. Probably more money than selling sperm, right?

Amanda 42:26

Yeah. Because the retrieval process is a lot different.

Josh 42:29

Well, I'm sure that you've got a lot more guys willing to Yes.

Amanda 42:32

There's no like cup and a magazine for egg retrieval. Like that's like general surgery and stuff.

Josh 42:39

Talk about an open book test. Alright, folks. Oh god. Until next week, y'all have a happy, happy Easter.

Amanda 42:47

Or, you know, Passover, whatever it is you celebrate.

Josh 42:51

Oh, by the way, I almost forgot. Thank you to Chris Barron of the Spin Doctors. Thank you to Ricky Kendall of Gainesville and AJCW of Outer Space and the Monument Mythos for our music. That's all I got for you. Peace.

Amanda 43:04

And also your sperm.

Josh 43:06

I don't have that for them.

Amanda 43:07

No way.

Josh 43:11

Write in and I'll send you a sample. Whatever. It's laying around anyway.

SPEAKER_00 43:15

Ah, bye.

Josh 43:16

Bye.

SPEAKER_00 43:18

Welcome back to the conversation. You don't down to imagination. You want me and I am you. I want to be strange.

unknown 44:00

Yeah.