Josh's Double Nickels and Amanda's ADHD

It's Josh'a Birthday. And ADHD takes control of the show.

Super Familiar with The Wilsons 
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Transcript

Welcome Back And A Hard Update

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Welcome back to the conversation. Tell me what I can do. You don't go to imagination. You don't want me and I am you. I want to be familiar. Don't be stranger.

Amanda 0:40

Welcome to Super Familiar with the Wilsons. I'm Amanda.

Remembering Chicken Tom

Josh 0:42

And I'm Josh, and this is the podcast about marriage 2.0 with kids. And side quests. Folks, welcome back to our little cavalcade of weirdness and fun. We did not record last week. I did put an episode out a little bit later just to because uh people uh messaged me and said, why aren't you why aren't you on there? So I did want to talk a little bit about why we weren't on there. Unfortunately, a very good friend of mine has passed away. He passed away last weekend, and you all know him as Chicken Tom, a frequent guest on the program, and we always give him the shout-out at the end of the program. He was uh an amazing person, full of curiosity. That's the thing that that I really appreciate about him. He would get interested in something and then study the hell out of it and buy all the things for it. Now, sometimes he'd buy all the things for it and then do it twice, and then that would be it. But we're not here. We're not here to call him out as he is in the great beyond. So, Chicken Tom, we will miss you, and of course, we will always shout you at the end of this show because you are and have been a part of who we are.

Processing Grief With Shared Events

Amanda 1:57

Sending much love to Chicken Tom's family and looking forward to continuing uh visits from him in special ways. I had a visit from a cardinal this morning while I was sitting outside having my coffee, and I texted Josh because he was inside and said my mom came to visit, and he said, How do you know it's not Tom? So enjoy those little moments from the people that you that you love who are no longer physically on this plane, but find ways to still let you know that they are there.

The 55th Birthday Party Stories

Josh 2:24

We did do some things during the week and this weekend that helped me deal with and process that. First thing we did on Tuesday, we went to Colin's show and tell event at the Bull Downtown. Colin has been a guest on the podcast, and he has a storytelling event where people just reflect on a particular theme, and so that was cool. We did that Tuesday. It's just great to be in a group of people who were there for the same reason. It's a space that I'm very, very content in. And then we had my 55th birthday party Friday night.

Amanda 2:58

That's right, friends. Josh is what he likes to say as double nickels. I am afraid that everyone will interpret that as double nipples, and no one wants that.

Josh 3:07

So Um, I think everyone wants double nipples.

Amanda 3:10

What's the I mean your double nipples?

Josh 3:12

Like Marky Mark, you can have three. Is that triple nickels? Nipples?

Amanda 3:16

That's too many. That's when you're 555, we'll have a triple nickel birthday party. Nipple. See, it's hard. It's difficult. No, it's not hard. Don't think nipples in hard. It is difficult. Anyway, Josh turned 55 on the 17th, friends, and we had a lovely party.

Josh 3:31

We did. You did an exceptional job. Thank you. You made a a 55 cake, which was two cakes that somehow you shaped into numbers, and it was it had delicious cream cheese frosting on it. And I was homemade by the way. And I was appalled because I saw this big bowl of cream cheese frosting you had made. You had already frosted the the whole uh cake and you were gonna throw it out.

Amanda 3:53

I didn't need it.

Josh 3:54

I needed it.

Amanda 3:55

I know. I actually started it. Muffy was helping me finish the cake because I was getting frustrated with the with the frosting of it. There was, you know, some left in the bowl, and I said, just put it in the sink. And she looked at me and said, No, Josh will want this. And so Muffy actually rescued it for you.

Josh 4:10

And we had way too many people in this tiny little house, and you even had well wishes from people who couldn't show up.

Amanda 4:16

Yes.

Josh 4:17

So that was that was really great. And you printed them out and you put them on a big uh poster.

Amanda 4:22

Yeah. So what I did is I asked people to send me in honor of Josh's 55th birthday, five things they appreciate about him. Now, for my 50th birthday, you had people do video messages, or you had people write things and then read it to me in person at the party. This this is very representative of you and that you're a multimedia type person. I am a writer, so I asked everybody just to send me words. I am a lover of words, and I'm gonna put these all together in a book for you. But for example, we did have one friend who went rogue and I couldn't make it fit into five things, so I saved it for the podcast. This is from Justin Henson.

Josh 4:57

Amongst other podcasts, he does the movie wire, which is about cars.

Amanda 5:03

What? No, it's about movies, or maybe it was about cars in movies, like Herbie the Love Bug and Light Name and Queen.

Josh 5:09

Film reviews. So anyway, go ahead.

Amanda 5:11

All right. So this says, I decided to do mine in a Dr. Seuss format just so I can get funny word noises on your show in appreciation to Josh. Oh Josh, the things about you and the places you will go. I like how you walk, cur plop, cur plink. I like how you talk, ker zap, curzink. I like how you sip, glug glug, kerchink. Though sometimes I wonder just what you might think. I like how your beard goes whoosh in the wind. I like it's got its own place to tickle your chin. It swirls and it twirls like a fuzzy old kite. I'm half sure it giggles all day and all night. No, I don't need this beard laughing all night. I love how you joke with a wink and a grin. Your humor's so bright it could light up a bin. Oh, Josh Wilson, truly, it's perfectly clear you're a wonderful man. Happy birthday.

Josh 5:57

I love how it ends with not a rhyme. That is perfect.

Amanda 6:01

So thank you, Justin, and thank you to everyone who reached out, including our friend Chris Barron. I get Chris Barron to send lovely well wishes about Josh. Although um now Chris Barron and I are texting friends, so he's not just your friend anymore.

Josh 6:15

Okay, that's fine. That's it just Is that a weird flex? I just very weird. Didn't like that. Let's move on.

Amanda 6:21

Okay.

Josh 6:22

One of the funny things that happened is that we bought a drink container for the party.

Amanda 6:26

Like a beverage dispenser, like a fancy one.

Josh 6:29

And Winthrop, his reaction to this was surprising. So he he took a look at it and he said, We own this now.

Amanda 6:39

I'm so excited.

Josh 6:40

And then he hugged it.

Amanda 6:42

I know.

Josh 6:43

It's the reaction you would expect if I had gotten him a puppy.

Amanda 6:46

Yeah. No, he was, I think maybe because he's been in so many hotels in his lifetime and you see them like in hotel lobbies and stuff, like with the fun fruit in it. So I yeah, it just empty sitting on the counter. So excited. So now we know what to get him for Christmas because he wants multiple ones. He's planned out what is gonna go in each of them. And then at the party, it was super cute. He and another friend who's his age were just standing there serving themselves up some citrus water just over and over and over again. And then he was super sweet. So I had put it back, we had put the water into a pitcher and put it in the refrigerator overnight. And then yesterday morning I put it back out into the dispenser so he could get it for himself. But the citrus, well, you know, when citrus sits in water overnight and it's got the the rind on it, it gets kind of bitter and like pithy. And he was so cute because he I don't think he wanted to hurt my feelings, but he took a sip of it and then he waited a minute and said, I thought I wanted this, but I'm not really in the mood for it, so I got this for you.

Josh 7:45

That's great. Well, all I know is that my nine-year-old now is emotionally bonded with a liquid vessel. So I don't know what to do about all that. I mean, honestly, like I've seen less tenderness when he hugs you.

Amanda 7:58

I know he loves this thing so much. So I never in a million that was not on my bingo card for 2026.

Josh 8:04

Yes. So we had a lovely time at the birthday party. And I'll tell you what, I told the people gathered this as well. I realize about myself is that is that I enjoy bringing people together and connecting them and just sitting back and and enjoying that, like sitting back and watching that. Like I don't need to be the center of attention. In fact, I get uncomfortable when I'm the center of attention a lot of times. I'm definitely like an introverted introvert.

Amanda 8:31

You're an extroverted introvert.

Josh 8:33

No, I'm an introverted introvert.

Amanda 8:35

Who sometimes like cosplays as an extrovert?

Josh 8:37

Right, with delusions of grandeur. Um I invited some people from different worlds, and they all came together, and I just enjoyed watching them get to know each other. It was a wonderful.

Amanda 8:48

Yeah, it was like they were exchanging phone numbers and they were making plans, and it was very it was very maybe. No, these people were friend bonding, not like everybody here had a significant other well.

Josh 9:00

We can call it the double nipple friend club.

Amanda 9:02

Nope, we're not doing anything. We are people.

Josh 9:05

We are calling this the double nipple friend club.

Amanda 9:07

That's when you move to the retirement community and get your upside-down pineapple.

Josh 9:13

Uh and then last night we went to a Sopranos party hosted at um someone else's house. A house in which I'd never been, and a house that has, as you walk into the door, a room to the right. It is probably a 10 foot by four foot room. Like it used to be uh the guy was explaining to me, it used to be like a mud room, which I didn't know they had mud rooms here in Gainesville. He turned it into a tiny tiki bar.

Amanda 9:39

So amazing. It is like just big enough for a bar and a couple bar stools and then a couple chairs and a little small table. Yeah. But it is the most decorated tiki bar I have and like super concentrated.

Josh 9:53

Yes.

Amanda 9:53

Like all in one tiny little space. Now you spent some time in there. I didn't spend any time in there because I had never seen the Sopranos, and so they were playing it with the captions on. So I just sat on the couch and watched like a full episode. I got super sucked into it. But I didn't spend any time in the tiki bar. So what was what was it like being immersed in this space?

Josh 10:12

Well, because it's so concentrated, it kind of veered into the Spongebob territory. Yeah. But it was super cool. Like it was painted dark, and you had colorful lights in there, and everywhere you looked, there was like a detail. There was something. There must have been at least, I mean, I don't know, uh, several hundred things on little shelves and little corners, little nooks and crannies. I mean, there must have been a good$25 sunk into the value of all of all of these tchotchkis. No. But it was very cool, very interesting. He was explaining to me that sometimes they spend hours upon hours with friends in there, and it seems to get bigger on the inside as the night goes on.

Amanda 10:51

That's really interesting.

Josh 10:52

Well, that's really interesting. Just explain drunk in a new way, is what they've done.

Dream Uses For Small Spaces

Amanda 10:57

I didn't think about that. Well, so but that begs the question then. Like, what if you had this small space, what would your dream for it be?

Josh 11:05

Like a four by ten space? I don't know. Let's ask the audience. Email us at familiarwilsons at gmail.com. If you had a little space, like maybe a 10 by 4 space in your house, what would you do with it? Because it's not good for much practical, I don't think. You can't, I mean, I guess it could be a tiny guest room, like just for a bed, right? Uh or a tiny escape room. I don't know. What would you do with it? Maybe you do have a little space in your house that you've done something neat with. FamiliarWilsons at gmail.com. Let us know. Because I don't know what I would do with it. Do you have an idea? I do.

Amanda 11:38

Oh, I know. Like right off the bat.

Josh 11:39

All right, we'll save it for next week when we um when we talk about people's answers.

Amanda 11:43

You know, we have the closet under the stairs here, and it's a signific, I mean, it's pretty big. How I mean, that's probably what, 10 by 3.

Josh 11:50

Yeah, that sounds about right. But we just use this to store shit in.

Amanda 11:53

Right. It's just a it's a storage closet, and we got, you know, but it's also where the kids and I go when there's tornado warnings when you're at work because it is fully enclosed. But I that I think about that. Like I will, you know, if I didn't need the storage, I could turn it into something pretty cool.

Josh 12:08

The thing is, is that we have Andrew's old room that right now we use as an office, but really what we use it as just a store shit in.

Amanda 12:15

Yeah. Oh, let's do it, let's make a tiki bar. It would be big.

Josh 12:19

Well, maybe, but that's been done. Like we've seen that done. So what could we do unique? Like an Irish pub?

Amanda 12:24

Let's do like a British pub, an Irish pub. Let's do that. We get wood paneling on the walls. Yes, yes, yes, let's do it.

Josh 12:29

How much money are we willing to sink into this?

Amanda 12:31

No, but here this is I this is what I think is super cool about it, is that it's not like a we put all the money into it and we get it done in, you know, like one week. This is a thing that we start like over time, and it's like you're really investing in it. And so like we thrift and we go to the antique places and we find things just as we find them. Like it's a it's a it's an invet it's a project, it's like a theme party pro you know I love a theme party with my whole heart. I mean, I'd never seen the Sopranos, and I bought myself some velour leopard print skinny jeans and a gold lamay top. I mean, I and I wore really obnoxious press on nails with like diamonds in them. And I oh I'm so excited. Let's do this.

Josh 13:15

So are you saying one wood panel a week? What do you mean? Okay, all right. Well, we we will see.

Amanda 13:20

And then when people are like, what is this? You're like, this is our eventual, this is our eventual pub, but like it's slow, I'm so excited. And then it could be also like kind of like dark academia, so it's like kind of like a library-ish thing, but with a with a sorry, sorry, pub and library, no, ma'am. No, we're gonna have bookshelves and like leather armchairs and like maybe a fireplace, and then all the-fireplace. A fireplace? Yes. How no? I am so excited. No, it's not this is my new project. Remember when I was doing little baby houses?

Josh 13:54

Yes.

Amanda 13:54

I stopped that.

Josh 13:55

Yes.

Amanda 13:56

Because I think I have adult onset ADHD. Or maybe it's always been here.

SPEAKER_06 14:00

Yes.

Amanda 14:00

Um, which makes sense because I also have anxiety and they tend to be comorbid. I'm gonna make a pub in my house and it's gonna have a fireplace.

Josh 14:11

And we can't have a fireplace. Our bedroom is right above it. No, it's gonna be a good one. We don't want to smoke us ourselves out.

Amanda 14:17

It'll be electric.

Soccer Heat And Sportsmanship

Josh 14:18

Okay, yes. Speaking of electric, uh, fireplace would have been great yesterday when it was fucking 107 degrees.

Amanda 14:24

Oh my god, we went to soccer.

Josh 14:25

We went to soccer, and we're not doing a soccer update, like with the music and the announcing because the the game was atrocious. Winthrop's team lost four to zero, at least four to zero.

Amanda 14:34

But he played really, really hard.

Josh 14:36

He played well, but the headline of this story is that it was so damn so bad.

Amanda 14:41

Like kids were like having to come out of the game because they were getting overheated. Like it was so bad.

Josh 14:46

The the game itself was so bad that God was personally offended, and he just started to turn up the heat to drive the children off of the field. That's how bad the game was for nil, and it wasn't even close.

Amanda 14:59

No, but we are considering it a moral victory because Winthrop was so upset the first game when they won six to nothing, but he was mad because his shots were getting blocked because this is the first time they played with goalies. Yes. The league he was in before they didn't have goalies yet. He played really hard, but we had a lot of conversation about sportsmanship, and what I loved, my favorite part of the game, was one of the opposing players fell and Winthrop went over and put his hand out and picked him up. And that's class.

SPEAKER_02 15:25

I like that.

Amanda 15:26

And in this league that he's in, they also do a different sportsmanship value each week, and the player that exhibits that value the most gets a medal. And Winthrop got it yesterday, and when I asked him what it was for, he said, I don't know, playing hard or something. So I don't really know what the value was. Um, but it was a it was a good Winthrop day, the team not so much. I like this coach, super nice guy, but the other coach was out coaching him like a lot, right?

When Kids Call You Ancient

Josh 15:53

Well, because the other coach was actually talking about positions and he had a board that he was writing everyone's assignments on, and yeah, no, that that guy he and he looked like Cam from Modern Family, if you're familiar with the thing where he was also a football coach and all so like he reminded me of that. It was great fun to see him running after the ball because he was a larger man, but yeah, no, we got out coached, out classed, out everything else. But Winthrop did well and he picked up kid up off the ground. So what can you what can you do? I will tell you one thing happened this week about soccer that caused me great distress. I was talking to Winthrop, and I had mentioned in passing that you know, I loved to play soccer when I was a kid, right? I didn't know this about you, not organized soccer, just like I also didn't know this about you, though. Yeah, so I'm talking to him about it. Well, because we're talking about camp, and one of the things I love to do at camp was was play soccer. And then he got this look on his face, like the look of one who was recalibrating how history worked in his mind. And he looked at me, he he said, They had soccer back then.

SPEAKER_03 16:54

Yeah, mm-hmm.

Josh 16:54

Yep, you're welcome. So apparently, before in his mind, I predate soccer.

Amanda 16:59

When did soccer?

Josh 17:00

I I predate the concept of kicking a ball around with intent. Like in the Iron Age, they got like goats' heads and kicked that shit around. Apparently, in his mind, I'm I came before that. This is not a thing that I need on the lead up to my 55th birthday, is is him thinking that I was uh contemporaries with the creation of fire.

SPEAKER_02 17:21

I love it so much.

Josh 17:22

No.

Amanda 17:23

I'm I'm stuck back on our pub. I'm back here.

Josh 17:26

Oh my god. So should we stop the show now and talk about this?

Amanda 17:30

No, no, no. I just want to tell you that. So I'm starting, this is a thing that's new in the Wilson household, is that uh May 11th, I take my first course as a doctoral student. So I'm getting my doctor of education, and I had my like orientation thing the other night, and I'm realizing that I'm really gonna need a dedicated like space to to work and it needs to be in a pub.

Josh 17:54

So this pub that we're gonna have is gonna have library books and a desk in it. No, ma'am. Why? It's not then that's not a fucking pub, is it? With a desk in it. Get out of here.

Amanda 18:04

Then just get me a cozy armchair.

Josh 18:05

No, you'll have to like take your classes at the bar.

Amanda 18:08

Yeah, that's good too.

Josh 18:10

They're gonna the people at the thing are gonna say, because they're remote classes, you're gonna be on Zoom, they're gonna say, You're gonna have to turn off the neon sign, please.

Amanda 18:16

No, there's no people. We need a pub dog. We've got a pub dog. Never mind. I'm so excited by this. But yes, no, you're old, is what we learned about soccer.

Josh 18:27

And didn't I just tell you another thing that that he said to me the other day? I was taking him to school and he made a reference to something that I still don't fucking know what it is. And I said, Oh, Winthrop, what does that mean? And he says to me, Oh, it's a Gen Alpha joke, you wouldn't get it. He's nine, and now he's gatekeeping humor from me.

SPEAKER_06 18:45

Yep, yeah.

Josh 18:46

What is going on here? This is what we've raised. A child who is so like into this idea of being in this exclusive club that he wants to keep me out of it. This is a Gen Alpha joke. Oh, you mean it doesn't make sense? So the two older boys introduced me to the idea of the anti-joke, which isn't a new idea, like Andy Kaufman and some of these performance artists did anti-jokes like in the day, but it it felt like they had thought and intent by it. Anti-joke now just simply means something that's not funny, but you laugh at it anyway.

Amanda 19:16

Yeah, I don't know. Have you heard of this concept? No, I don't want to do it.

Josh 19:19

No, again, you can't handle the fact that the comedians we had back in the day were of such better quality than the ones that we have now.

Amanda 19:27

Okay. I just feel like the anti-joke is any four or five-year-old trying to tell you a joke. Yeah, well, because it never makes sense. I spent 16 years teaching four and five-year-olds, and I mean you can only laugh at things that aren't funny so many times.

Josh 19:41

That is kind of along the the concept of like when do you stop letting your kid beat you in sports?

Amanda 19:48

You never let your kid beat you in sports, or any kind of board game, like or card game.

Josh 19:54

We've done this, he cheats. So, like, I I'm not letting him get away with that when he's cheating at a game.

Amanda 20:00

All kids do that. Like, all kids do this. It's developmentally a thing, it's a milestone.

Josh 20:07

Cheating is a milestone. Very good. When do they like break out of that into I'm gonna be an honest human being now?

Amanda 20:14

I think we're getting close. Oh, I hope so. She picked a kid up at soccer. I have hope.

Josh 20:18

So that's our soccer update for this week. We'll see what next week brings. Hopefully, it will be just a little bit cooler.

SPEAKER_03 20:25

I want pizza.

Josh 20:27

What's going on?

SPEAKER_03 20:28

I don't know. ADHD.

Why Gas Pump Ads Feel Gross

Josh 20:33

Are you a parent? Do you have a child? Has that child ever looked you dead in the eyes and said something that sounded like English but wasn't? Introducing Kids Speak AI. It's the artificial intelligence that goes right in your ear and translates what your children say back into a language that humans can understand. Just last week, a father in Ohio heard his son say, That's giving low-key sleigh no cap. The father didn't have kids speak. He could do nothing else but simply walk into the sea. But with kids speak AI, you'll know what Riz means in real time. You'll understand why everything is either bussing or a federal crime. You'll find out what a Sigma is and whether you are one. Spoiler, you're not. Kids speak AI because your nine-year-old just told you it's a Gen Alpha joke and you didn't get it. And he was right. Kids Speak AI. Available now wherever dignity used to be sold. Disclaimer, Kids Speak AI cannot guarantee your child will ever find you funny. No technology can do that. We're sorry. Sometimes, Amanda, I make notes in my app here of things that I want to talk about. They're not fully formed ideas, they're just things that that hit me at any particular time. So I write down. So one of them was I don't need commercials at my gas pumps.

SPEAKER_02 22:09

Yeah, it's obnoxious.

Josh 22:11

I get the fact that we are captive, right? There's nothing we can do there. We're we're not going anywhere. If you're wanting to catch someone at a weak moment where you're likely to snare them into buying your brand at the gas pump is not the place.

Amanda 22:27

I wonder how I mean it's got to be effective.

Josh 22:29

I really keep doing it. I think that that it's just to the point now where they're just trying to shove so much branding and commercialization all at us that they're just picking the most random places that, oh, we don't have commercials at gas pumps yet. Oh, well, let's do that. It is really like a seven-year-old kid has come up with this, is like, oh, this will be a good idea. Like, what's next? And I don't have any sort of joke saying, Oh, what's next, you know, on the toilet paper. Although that's an idea on the toilet paper. Because people spend a lot of time in the toilet and they could be browsing on their phone or they could read be reading the ad on the toilet roll.

Amanda 23:04

I think that there are TVs that go in the back of the stall door, so that I mean I I've seen this places.

Josh 23:11

Well, I've seen TVs and uh on top of urinals on the wall behind urinals. But again, like I don't want to be like watching the game get excited, jump up and down, and then I've like sprayed the entire rest of the restroom. But I just I just think they need to stop with all of the advertising everywhere because it's gonna get to a point where we're all just gonna get sick of it. Right and we're gonna run. All I'm saying is that that I get to the the gas pump and it's so loud, it's so aggressive because it needs to be. They need to have gas stations that advertise no commercials at pumps, and people will go to that one because it's just a little less annoyance during your day.

Amanda 23:51

I have seen somewhere on some social media video that there is a way to mute it. Oh, but I don't remember what it is. Like it's like besides smashing the screen, there's like a way that you push a button or something, and then everybody was like, Oh my god, it's the best thing to know ever, because everybody's annoyed with it. So I think we can do a little research and figure out how to at least mute the thing.

Josh 24:13

This is a serious issue. I think it's a human rights issue. I need to be able to be at the pump pumping the ridiculously expensive gas.

SPEAKER_02 24:20

I was gonna say, already annoyed because it's so expensive.

Josh 24:23

Yes. And I just need a quiet space where I can consider my economic grief. Yes. So stop it. Stop yelling at me. And and gas stations, you want to attract people, don't need coffee, don't need donuts, don't need to car wash, just promise people that you're not gonna have mechanized yelling at them during their gas pump experience. And let me tell you, that will do it.

Amanda 24:43

And if you're a listener and you know how to make the thing be quiet, please write in and let us know.

Gray Hair Plus Food Name Rants

Josh 24:47

Familiarwilsons at gmail.com. The other thing I noticed about myself is that my hair, such as it is, I keep my hair shaved, bald, right? Sometimes I let it grow out. Well, I'm noticing now that the hair at my temples, when it comes out, it's graying.

SPEAKER_03 25:02

Yes, friend.

Josh 25:03

If you're looking at me from afar, I've let my hair grow out a little bit. The hair at the temples is graying, and then there's a strip of hair that's coming before the tragic place where it decided to stop growing, and then there's the bald part on top. I look like I have a tonsure. I look like I have one of those haircuts that monks have where it's just a strip going all the way around, kind of like a toilet seat. I don't need that. I don't need to look like a monk. I don't need people coming up to me and trying to give me confession.

Amanda 25:33

Well, since your beard is gray, if you let the temples grow out, it just looks like your beard is taking over.

Josh 25:38

Well, I mean, I wish my beard would take over and go all the way up. Maybe I should grow my beard out. I've thought this before. So that it's like a couple feet long and then just tie it above.

Amanda 25:48

Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, um, do your ears hang low? Do they wobble to and fro? Can you time in a knot? Can you time in a bow? But it's your beard.

Josh 25:55

What the hell just happened?

Amanda 25:56

You know that song?

Josh 25:57

I I don't. I don't. I I don't I think that I've heard that song, but ears wasn't the wasn't the the thing that was hanging low.

Amanda 26:05

Do they wobble to and fro? Can you tie them in a knot? Can you tie them in a bow? Can you throw them over your shoulder like a continental soldier? Do your ears hang low?

Josh 26:13

I don't think we have rights to that song.

Amanda 26:14

I don't think that that song is uh anybody's wanting you to pay anything for that song because I think it's really old.

Josh 26:20

You know what? I just it occurred to me something about the Sopranos party. So I was gonna wear a Valure tracksuit.

SPEAKER_02 26:26

Yes, but you've lost the pants.

Josh 26:28

But I lost the pants, and also my friend Mike O'Malley, last time I saw him, I was wearing the top of the tracksuit and he couldn't stop touching it.

Amanda 26:36

Well, you were very, very soft.

Josh 26:38

It was very soft, and and he was under the influence of several Guinnesses, Guinea, as I say. Guinea, yes. And so I determined that I would not wear that to this party because he would be at the party.

SPEAKER_02 26:49

Do you know why him rubbing on you all now?

Josh 26:53

As wonderful as a guy as he is. So I was looking at what people would wear in the Sopranos, and and Tony has an outfit where he's just wearing uh one of those untucked shirts that's straight across the the bottom and and a um tank top and chains and a pinky ring and all that. And I said, Oh, I can dress like that. And I realized that aside from the pinky ring and the chains, that was just what I wear going out.

Amanda 27:21

Yeah, no, you these is normal clothes for you. I gave you the chains I owned, and the pinky ring was what, your high school ring? Yeah. So you even owned the pinky ring. Like pretty much all of this was uh was still in your possession.

Josh 27:35

So this was a uh this was a party that was specifically designed for people to dress up as people that they weren't usually, and I just basically came as myself.

Amanda 27:45

You did. It was so good. I had to go thankfully source my outfit from secondhand stores. I did not own any gold lamain or velvet leopard print.

Josh 27:56

And another thing, we need to not call baby spinach baby spinach.

SPEAKER_02 28:01

Oh, right, we were talking about this.

Josh 28:02

We should call this the the ADHD podcast because and we should just let it fly because I sometimes I do editing to make things make sense. Yeah, no. And I might not do that anymore because I am double nipples right now, and I don't know that I care anymore.

Amanda 28:17

But but is double nipples four nipples or just two nipples? Because we're already using the plural.

Josh 28:24

Double nipples four nipples.

Amanda 28:26

Because double nipple would be two nipples.

Josh 28:28

So four nipples would be like a like a party for dogs. Yeah. What's six nipples? That would be pigs and cats. I don't know. What are we talking about?

SPEAKER_03 28:37

We're talking about ADHD.

Josh 28:39

So I feel guilty whenever I eat baby spinach because it's baby spinach. You get the image of like this innocent little plant like looking up at you saying, Oh, is he gonna take me out for a ride? Am I going to the park? And then I eat it.

Amanda 28:51

You don't feel bad when you eat the animals, though, friend.

Josh 28:53

No, no, no, because I don't eat baby animals, by the way. Yeah. Um, so we need to call baby spinach something else.

Amanda 28:58

Yeah. Okay, what would you call it?

Josh 29:00

I don't know, small spinach. Why can't we fucking just call it spinach? Why do we need to call it baby spinach?

Amanda 29:05

Because there's a difference between the leaves of the adult spinach and the baby spinach. Mature spinach and immature spinach.

Josh 29:11

You know, immature sounds like it's just like it's not ready for you. I don't know. All I'm saying is that we need to not refer to food in anthropomorphic terms. Okay. So there's no need to call it baby spinach. Oh, what did you do last night? Oh, I ate the baby. No, we're not.

Amanda 29:27

Big spinach, small spinach. Done.

Josh 29:29

Done. Good. Well, to wrap up this ADHD section, as it turned out to be, if the shape of your pasta materially affects your evening, you need to sit quietly and contemplate your life choices.

Amanda 29:43

Did the pasta offend you last night?

Josh 29:45

No, but that's a thing. Like, people are like, oh, I like this pasta shape. I don't like that pasta shape. It's pasta. It doesn't matter.

Amanda 29:51

It does matter because some of it holds it.

Josh 29:52

Oh, you're that person.

Amanda 29:54

Some of it holds sauce better. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 29:58

We had really good big ZD last night, so that's all I'm gonna talk to you about at the Sopranos party.

Listener Email On Shopping And Neighbors

Josh 30:03

Forget about it. Email. It's time for emails. Again, if you want to email us any little old thing, familiarwilsons at gmail.com. We get uh emails often, um, and we are happy to read at least some of them. Now, if they go on too long, we're gonna edit. Um, but just know that that you're gonna get that. So, Leo, friend Leo, emails us. He says, I always want to email you after every episode, but life be life. He said, Loved each of your guest episodes, but uh especially found Madison's episode fascinating. Madison was the one who was an embalmer, so go back a few episodes and listen to that. We should have her back on. Um, he says, as for self-checkout lanes, I've always said they were invented for guys like me. When I shop, I'm usually only there for a few things. I shop only for the exact things I'm there for, and then I'm ready to go. So they're perfect for me. Now, of course, as Amanda and I established yet again yesterday, she likes to wander around the store, and I am more like Leo, where I just want to get to it and get out.

Amanda 31:06

I don't know what I need until I see it.

Josh 31:09

That's a problem then. So you you you you you're saying that we would save a whole hell of a lot of money if we just blindfolded you all the time. Yep. Okay, very good. Leo continues and he says, Walmart is truly the problem child, though. I'm not sure about the one near you, but here there are about 20 checkout lanes, and some of them self-checkouts, but almost all of them are closed with no cashier on any given day. As such, sometimes you get stuck behind someone with a full cart and self-checkout because they simply have no other choice. Here, Kroger is probably the last store that actually has cashiers in almost every lane and baggers. As for merging into traffic, Ohio drivers notoriously have no clue how to properly merge. Well, Leo, I don't think anyone does. I think that was the point of us talking about it. No one knows. It's been a running joke here for as long as I can remember. Add to that, here in the Cincinnati area, everyone thinks they're a race car driver. I guess the good news is this keeps you very alert at all times. Yes, it keeps you in a state of high stress and cortisol. That's wonderful. He said, kids snitching is another form of the universe getting revenge on us. Yes, we talked about Winthrop snitching on me to his other little friend. I did not like it. Well, Leo says, never ever say anything in front of a kid that you don't want the general public to know about at some random functional gathering. Now, I have become even more cognizant about that since Winthrop grassed me up to the neighbors. You, however, and you can tell me if I'm wrong, you, however, say all manner of things in front of the children that it seems that you don't care whether they say or not.

Amanda 32:50

What do you why what? Why are you calling me out on this? And what did I say that you think this about?

Josh 32:55

I feel like I'm often saying don't say that in front of the kids.

Amanda 32:58

Yeah, I don't know. I guess I just don't like I operate under I think everybody needs to have accurate information. And so, like when Winthrop asked what my shirt meant, which has it's a reference to the Stalin witch trials, and it says they missed one, and I started to explain it, and you like went into Monty Python and were like, if the witches don't float, and so like because I was gonna you're like float witches and ducks and whatever, and you took because I was ready to talk about burning people at the stake. So yeah, I guess I just don't I don't think about it.

Josh 33:29

Well, I'm not talking about that. That's a different conversation on like how I want to keep the kids innocent for longer and you want to prepare them for the future. And I'm not saying one is right and one is wrong.

SPEAKER_02 33:42

I'm just probably a good mix of the both.

Josh 33:43

I'm just saying, like, if we're talking about someone, I Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think sometimes you're saying this, and I'm like, oh, we might run into that person that you said that about.

Amanda 33:52

Yeah, my mom said, yeah, no, actually, when Muffy was little, it got me in trouble a few times because she would tell her friends and they would tell her parents, and then I got in trouble.

Josh 34:00

So you have an example?

SPEAKER_03 34:01

I do, but I'm not gonna give it.

Josh 34:03

We'll talk about it off air. Leo continues. Now, of course, folks, he is responding to things that we talked about in past episodes, lest you think that this is another ADHD letter. He says the neighbor situation is kind of sad, and we talked about knowing your neighbors or not knowing your neighbors and all this and that. This is something we talk about often. The general lack of community in the U.S. We try our best to stay engaged with our neighbors as well, and we do pretty well with a few of them. I think if Littles came in uh for a few Easter eggs, that would be fine. We also don't mind neighborhood kids coming into our yards to play. We still have a trampoline and a jungle gym set, and from time to time there will be kids here playing.

Amanda 34:47

Or like a neighborhood gim, like a playground.

Josh 34:49

Yeah, he is like a playground. He's gonna have to, you know, install a water fountain and some bathrooms.

Amanda 34:55

Yes.

Josh 34:56

He said, Amanda just wanted to give you some positive energy for your Perry Menama situation. My wife is right there with you, so at night I essentially sleep in a walk-in cooler.

Amanda 35:05

Yes, Leo. Thank you for the positive vibes. I appreciate it. My um heart goes out to your wife. Last night, Josh in his sleep was complaining about how cold he was. Turns out he was sleeping on top of the blanket, and so I tried to move him and he told me to leave him alone and not tell him what to do. So maybe he also has the perimenopause.

Josh 35:26

He ends with lastly, Josh. I absolutely love the super familiar song since the first time you featured it as a short clip. Great tune, sir. That is our lovely friend Ricky Kendall. Look him up on all of the streaming apps. Actually, there are two Ricky Kendall. One of them, don't look them up. Look my Ricky Kendall up.

Amanda 35:46

Um, how do we know which one is which?

Josh 35:48

The one that sounds good is my Ricky Kendall. He says, Take care, Wilsons. You guys have soccer, and my weekends are currently consumed by my son's AAU tournaments. I can't complain because this helps keep us bonded, and we're making some wonderful memories. Yes, Leo, usually we make wonderful memories uh at soccer, except this last week where we just simply watch children melt like candles on the field. Yeah, it was really on the pitch, I should say.

Amanda 36:17

Really, really bad. And the other coach, and now I'm thinking about it, he brought a whole tent for his team to sit under when they were like 10 by 10.

Josh 36:25

Yeah. Pop-up. We should bring our tent.

Amanda 36:27

We're gonna bring our tent. I told the coach we bring our tent next week.

Josh 36:29

So you did? Yeah, I did. So now we have to do it. Oh, now I resist it. Okay. I gotta take the tent out and make sure it still works.

SPEAKER_05 36:37

No one likes to be told what to do.

Josh 36:40

And now is the time in the program where we tell you what to do. Amanda, what should we do?

Amanda 36:45

If you've got a nine-year-old and you don't know what to get them for Christmas or Hanukkah or whatever holiday you celebrate, get them a beverage dispenser. No, uh, I got actually when we were getting ready for the party, we had it catered by a local place. So if you are from Gainesville, Miapa, Latin food, so good. Perfect. I recommend I was a little like I could save money and I could make all of this stuff. No. When you're having a party, if your budget allows, cater that nonsense. I mean, and look cater it locally to a local establishment. But I also went to Trader Joe's and got a couple things to supplement, and they have a chili lime chicken that is just like a chicken breast sliced up, already made, and you just heat it. And that got so many compliments at the party. So my suggestion is if you're local, me a pa. If you are not, go try the chili lime chicken from Trader Joe's.

Josh 37:36

My suggestion is keep having birthdays, they're fun.

SPEAKER_02 37:39

Yes.

Josh 37:45

Alright, Amanda, that's all there is. There is no more double nipples.

Amanda 37:50

Triple nipples?

Josh 37:51

No.

Amanda 37:52

Quadruple nipples.

Josh 37:54

What'd you think of that mess?

Amanda 37:56

Um, I enjoyed it, but my brain has always been all over the place, so I have no problem tracking it. I hope good luck to all of you out there in listening land.

Josh 38:04

I wonder if people will enjoy that because that's the way they think, or they'll just say, I cannot do this because my kids do this all the time.

Amanda 38:11

I don't know.

Josh 38:12

Alright, well, the dog is jumping up trying to get it.

Amanda 38:16

I told you I wanted pizza.

Josh 38:17

Trying to get it the pizza that you are now eating while we're recording. So let me hurry up and thank all the people before the dog rustles that pizza out of your hand. We'd like to thank, as always, Justin, Matt, Antonio, Josh Scar, Daniel J. Buckets, Chicken Tom.

Amanda 38:33

Raise a glass.

Josh 38:34

Raise a glass, Monique from Germany, Leo, Joey, Joey, Ryan Baker, Refined Gay Jeff, Kate and Tony, Mark and Rachel, Dan and Gavin. We need to have a shirt that says Kate and Tony, Mark and Rachel, Dan and Gavin. Wasn't that a thing?

Amanda 38:49

Oh, yeah, because it would be like Ross and Rachel, and da-da-da. Yeah, like famous couples.

Josh 38:53

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very good. We're doing it. We're doing it. It'll be on sale soon at the Familiar Wilsons merch shop. Email us about any old thing at familiarwilsons at gmail.com, particularly if you have a small space in your house and you've done something creative with it.

Amanda 39:08

Or you know what you would do.

Josh 39:10

Yeah, that's right. Um, we are uh happy to be back in the saddle. I missed not doing it last week. So um so thanks for joining us and continuing to join us. Remember that the most important thing in life are the deep connections you make with other people.

Amanda 39:24

And I would also like to open it up to Listening Land. If you want to send us five things you appreciate, Josh, about Josh for his double nipple birthday, please email us at familiarwilsons at gmail.com.

Josh 39:35

All right, folks, until next week. Bye.

Amanda 39:36

Bye, so you can see.