Celebration Florida, Instant Best Friends, and the Worst Game We've Ever Played

Amanda travels to a conference, Josh develops strong opinions about theme parks, and Winthrop unveils a previously undiscovered superpower involving the relationship between flavor and color. Meanwhile, somewhere in Central Florida, an Irish accent slowly migrates.

Also appearing in this episode: a suspiciously perfect town, a security guard quietly monitoring a Florida Man, a parking garage operating under entirely different laws of physics, a pantry exorcism, rogue paper bags, perimenopausal brain fog, patriotic inflatable overload, and a game so profoundly unnecessary that it circles all the way back around to being essential.

No life lessons. No self improvement. Just two people wandering through modern existence with microphones

Super Familiar with The Wilsons 
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Transcript

Mic Check And Cold Open

Josh 0:08

I am this close to the mic.

Amanda 0:09

Are you off to the side or you I am not, I'm straight onto the mic.

Josh 0:12

Alright. Why are you so quiet then? I don't know. I'm not used to this in our relationship.

Amanda 0:16

I know.

SPEAKER_05 0:17

You are made of meat, my friend, all the way down.

Josh 0:20

The following podcast uses words like and and also if you're not into any of that shit, then now's your chance.

SPEAKER_00 0:28

Three, two, one.

Josh 0:30

Run.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

Welcome back to the conversation. Tell me who I'm talking to. Get on down to my donation. You don't want me and I am you. A million yeah. I want to be familiar. Don't be stranger.

Teaching A Kid Ketchup Packets

Amanda 1:09

Welcome to Super Familiar with the Wilsons. I'm Amanda.

Josh 1:12

And I'm Josh, and we are the podcast about marriage 2.0 with kids.

Amanda 1:15

And side quests.

Josh 1:17

Amanda, we went on a side quest this week. Actually, it wasn't a side quest for you. You went on a work trip and then Winthrop and I tagged along. We'll talk about that a little bit. Maybe we learned some things about ourselves. Maybe we didn't. But first, we had not a big rite of passage, but like a little rite of passage this week with Winthrop. Or I did. I had a moment with a fathering moment with him.

Amanda 1:39

Okay.

Josh 1:40

Can you guess what it is?

Amanda 1:41

Did it happen today? No. Okay, because there was a lot of conversationing happening in here about parenting earlier with him.

Josh 1:47

Well, yeah, because he refuses to accept my parenting, but that's not what I'm talking about.

Amanda 1:52

Um, was it on his last day of third grade?

Josh 1:55

I taught him how to open a ketchup packet.

Amanda 1:57

Oh, I didn't know this was a life skill. One that he didn't have and two that he needed to succeed in life.

Josh 2:05

I mean, you can't get very far without knowing how to open a ketchup package.

Amanda 2:08

Or just don't eat ketchup. That's also a choice.

Josh 2:11

Anyway, I feel like there are big rites of passage and big moments that you have, like father to son, like learning to shave or learning how to drive, or even like son, I'm gonna teach you how to grill a burger. Okay. Or whatever. Um, but no, this was a a micro rite of passage. Okay. A micro thing. And I taught him how to open that. The thing of it is, well, he didn't know how to open it in the first place. He didn't know that that you opened it at the end, and that's why they have those little notches there. But the thing that you have to teach is how to open it without it detonating like a condiment-based landmine. Yes. And so that's that's what I taught him to strike the balance that many people can't strike, and that is everything comes out or nothing comes up. Um, there's no middle ground there, but there is, there's a sweet spot. Um, so I I I taught him that.

Amanda 2:56

And it was Did he receive this? He did, he did as well.

Josh 3:02

Maybe that's the thing. I need to store up more of these little moments where he accepts my parenting because he sure as shit doesn't accept them on the big things.

Amanda 3:10

No, he doesn't like to be told that he's wrong because then he starts to feel like he's done something bad and then he reacts a different way.

Josh 3:16

I need to store up all these little bitty teaching moments so I can feel better uh about myself as a father. Okay.

Amanda 3:23

And then I don't know what we're gonna do about the other things, but well, I mean, we're gonna survive him and he's gonna be okay, and you're gonna be okay.

Josh 3:30

Thank you. You're welcome. Thank you.

Amanda 3:31

Well, congratulations on that parenting win.

Josh 3:33

Yeah, it was uh it was a win. I'm taking it. I want my participation trophy.

Amanda 3:38

Okay, there's one back there for soccer. I'll give

Orlando Trip And Celebration Vibes

Amanda 3:40

it to you.

Josh 3:40

This week we went to Orlando because Amanda had a a conference that she presented at. Yes. Quite proud of you because apparently all the feedback uh Yeah, I'm good at my job. Yeah, she gets in front of tens of thousands of people and she teaches them how to be better at themselves.

Amanda 3:57

Uh yeah, okay. So yes, no, uh about maybe 150 people this week, over three days, so like 50 people a day. So it was all right. Um, I had a dream last night though that I was back in the classroom and I was really bad at teaching, like really bad. Like I was good at like connecting with kids and letting them know that like I cared about them, but I was really bad at teaching them how to do things, which is bad because my whole job is teaching teachers how to be teachers, and uh it was very upsetting. I was very upset when I woke up this morning. That's why I had to lay around and look at Instagram for about 30 minutes until I got over it. But no, I was in Tampa for two days and then I was in Orlando or Celebration, as it were, the Disney fied town of Florida. And yeah, it was good. I had a good time.

Josh 4:41

Folks, have you heard about Celebration? Celebration is is the town, it's the development that Disney decided we're gonna get in the business of creating a community, and it could not feel more. The only phrase that comes to mind is an old phrase, and that is Stepford. Yeah, like too manicured, too perfect. Interestingly, though, I understand that Disney long no longer um manages it or owns it or something. Disney has separated themselves from it in some way, which I think just goes to show you that even Mickey Mouse cannot come up against the full power of Karen, the HOA president. Because I'm quite certain that what happened was, you know, some Karen was upset about something and then drove Disney away.

Amanda 5:28

Yeah, so the whole conceit between uh behind Celebration was that you know, originally Disney, Walt Disney himself had this idea for the environmental prototype community of tomorrow, which became Epcot. And the idea behind that was going to be Experimental. Oh, did I say environmental? You did sorry, exper Well, it's also environmental, experimental.

Josh 5:48

Watch me be wrong. I'm not gonna look it up, but I think it's experimental.

Amanda 5:51

No, I think it is experimental. I think you're right. And there's like tons of Disney adults that yelled at me until you corrected me. They're listening to this podcast.

Josh 5:57

Disney adults do not listen to this podcast.

Amanda 5:59

I don't know. I think just I might be a Disney adult.

Josh 6:03

Oh, well, that might be so.

Amanda 6:04

And um, but we love you, Josh Gar. Um, yeah, so the idea was that you know they were Disney wanted to create this this community, this prototype community, but then Disney died before plans were really developed for it. So then I think this was sort of the Disney corporation's way of saying, let's try that. Um, I visited it when it first opened about 20 or so years ago. Uh, had a friend who worked at the parks and went, they they bought a house and went, and it just seemed like the birds were just a little bit too loud, like the sun was just a little bit too bright, like it did feel very curated, very um, what's that Jim Carrey movie with the where the people are all actors in his life? Truman Show. Truman Show. Very little Truman Show was what was happening there. And it still felt like that in the town center, but I get the impression that it's kind of a little bit more rundown. Karen not doing her job.

Josh 6:54

Yeah, well, I mean, that's what happens when you have a voice and authority, but no money.

Amanda 6:59

But man, did some of those houses go all out for the 4th of July already?

Josh 7:03

Yeah, they were decked. They were decked out, these houses, like as if Disney had done them.

Amanda 7:07

Like inflatables, like giant inflation. I didn't know there were that many inflatables dedicated to the birthday of America. I mean, there's this one house that we go to here for Christmas. Well, we go to this neighborhood, and I think that they own every minion inflatable that ever existed.

SPEAKER_04 7:25

Yeah.

Amanda 7:26

I mean, like, you can't walk, there's no space for them to walk in your yard, all the minions, but it's all like Christmas holiday themed, right? Which I think is the big market. I didn't know there were this many inflatables for the 4th of July until I saw it at this house in celebration.

Josh 7:38

Well, there are several hundred inflatables in the federal government, so it doesn't surprise me that also that is a spit take.

Amanda 7:46

I just went to swallow some coffee.

Josh 7:48

Anyway, so we visited Celebration. It was it was a bit creepy, you know. I I kept hearing music, and wherever we would walk, there was this music. I was like, this is weird. Like I'm used to that at Disney, but I wasn't thinking with that part of my brain in this town center until I realized that every maybe 12 feet was a speaker in the ground. Yeah. So there was always music. Now that would get on my fucking nerve after a while of living in this place, and I can't get away from like weird cover versions, by the way. So it was like Rocket Men, but not by Elton John, by the Disney singers or something like that.

SPEAKER_04 8:22

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, no, it was the Disney Fied version, of course.

Josh 8:24

Right. So, and here's the thing they made that choice, they didn't have to make that choice. Right. So apparently there's different rights, and you pay different uh amounts for rights to songs. Um, if you buy the original, it's more. If you buy the right to play a cover version, then it's slightly less, right? Disney clearly has more money than Satan. So they didn't have to. They someone said, Hey, let's do this. You know, at least, at least it wasn't like Donald Duck singing the Disney version of We Didn't Start the Fire.

Amanda 9:01

Uh I definitely had that like Donald Duck, like, oh God, what was that? Um Malcher Size. I had the Malchersize album.

Josh 9:09

Of course you did. Well, you grew up. You grew up in Central Florida. You you were all about Disney, me not so much in Miami.

Amanda 9:14

Well, I mean, yeah, my parents, we lived 45 minutes from Disney. And my dad's my dad worked for Scotty's, which was uh kind of like Lowe's or Home Depot, but it was, I don't know if it was specific to Florida or not. It is no longer a company, but they would do their company retreats at Disney. Like we would we would go to Disney. I mean, we went all I it was not unusual for me to go three, four times a year. Um, I can't go now because it's we are so priced out of it. Oh, yeah, it is absolutely insane. I mean, there are people, it's amazing to me because our kids, you know, Winthrop not so much, but the other kids have been several times. And I keep trying to, I'm like, people spend their entire life savings on one trip to this place, you know, coming from far away. And so we are so privileged to be able to do this, but also I'm kind of kind of over it. But I'm going back tomorrow because I have another conference that's right across the street

Is Disney Ever Worth It?

Amanda 10:05

from Disney Springs.

Josh 10:05

Well, here's the thing though, like you spend all this money on Disney, and I don't care what you say. Okay, it's never worth it. And you who spend the money, you know that it's not worth it, but God help you, you will not admit it. You refuse to admit that you just blew, you know, several payments for your house to to go to an overcrowded uh place where basically you stand in line the whole time, you're not gonna admit that you just shit a bunch of money into the porcelain bowl. You're not gonna do it. So I don't care how many adults who are Disney adults who go to Disney all the time, unless you're filthy rich, which I guess you have to be, you know, and we're not by any stretch poor. We're we've worked hard for our jobs and and we're comfortable. But if you're in our bracket, it there's always buyers of remorse with Disney. I don't care who you are. They're always it's never worth it. Never ever. All right, Disney adults, come at me. I want to hear it. FamiliarWilsons at gmail.com. Tell me I'm wrong.

Amanda 11:11

I don't I don't feel as strongly as you do about this because I do think there is something magical about it. And that's because I have I have really lovely childhood memories of it, but it was also a different time and much more affordable.

Josh 11:22

Um, but what you're doing right now is called the Stockholm Syndrome. Go ahead.

Amanda 11:26

Okay. Um, I I do think that there's something magical about it. I had a lovely time with the children when we went um to Mickey's Not So Scary. It was super crowded, it was much more reasonably priced because it was just a nighttime event, and I had a kidney stone, and I think I had a better time than you did. You were just grouch the whole time.

Josh 11:44

Yeah, well.

Amanda 11:46

So we're just not gonna take you anymore.

Josh 11:47

We've already made that podcast episode, so we're moving.

Amanda 11:50

If you stay here, we

Disney Springs Chaos And Pub Night

Amanda 11:52

go.

Josh 11:52

One thing we did do that we'd like to do every time we go down to Orlando is we went to Disney Springs, which is basically just, you know, Disney's retail outlet. Yeah, you know, yeah. You go there, but it's it's fun. It's fun to go. We always go to the Irish uh restaurant slash pub there. Ragland Road. Going in, I got the up and down look from the security lady because I was wearing a shirt that said Florida Man by our good friend, right?

Amanda 12:24

Uh uh uh wow god, why was it say f L R V LR V Inc, right? LR V, yes, I said that correctly. Um, Brian Mathian's company screen printing. If you're here in town, please go get them. Josh has some shirts with them, but yeah, Brian's Florida Man shirt.

Josh 12:39

Yeah, yeah. And I love the shirt, it's great. And yes, you should look up lvrinc.com and and go buy some of their shirts. I do have my Gainesville is for Lovers Love Bug shirt on there if if you want to support me in a very small percentage way. But anyway, I'm wearing this shirt. The security lady sees me, she looks me up and down, she smiles, but I guarantee him to you that instantly she pulled out a clipboard and put my name on some sort of list.

Amanda 13:07

Bald man orange shirt, Florida Band.

Josh 13:09

Florida man, you know. She she got on her little mic. She said subject entering property, voluntarily wearing warning label. Yes. And then the funny thing is, is that was in one portion of like the entrance and the exit. They're not together. Yeah. Right? So, but she was at the exit.

Amanda 13:29

She happened to find the exit when we were leaving.

Josh 13:31

Yeah, she happened to. No, she was posted. She could not leave her shift for the day until she knew until she she checked me off of that clipboard. So it was it was pretty funny. But by the way, I'm gonna talk about our time in the Irish pub. But as we were in the parking uh garage trying to leave, it was like it was like a live action driver's education final exam.

Amanda 13:56

God, nobody could drive in this garage.

Josh 13:58

It was the most ridiculous thing. People were stopping randomly, people were driving all crazy.

Amanda 14:05

Driving wrong, you know, like in a parking garage, it's one way, right? Like you go, you you enter a lane from one way or the other, and people were going down the wrong lanes, people were trying to come at I was driving, people trying to come at me to turn into my lane as I'm trying to leave the lane, and it's a wrong way for them.

Josh 14:21

I swear it felt like all of them were driving with one hand holding the steering wheel and one hand holding the driver's handbook. Like consulting, what do I do now? Yeah, oh oh what does this arrow mean? Oh my god, it was the worst. It was the worst it's ever been. Like that was Florida man driving there.

Amanda 14:39

Bless Winthrop because he was like, Well, maybe they just learned how to drive. Maybe they're 16 and they thought the first thing I want to do when I'm able to drive is go to Disney Springs because that would be cool. Like he was trying to empathize with these people and or get us to calm down a little bit.

Josh 14:52

Yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy. So the thing that we love to do in Disney Springs is go to the Raglan Road Irish pub/slash restaurant. Now, it's obviously the Disney version of an Irish pub, so it's way too big and way too curated, right? But we like it anyway. We love the atmosphere, and they have um Irish dancers and Irish music, and that's a lot of fun, which by the way, we were standing right next to the podium that's in the center of the room that the one Irish dancer is on.

Amanda 15:22

Yeah.

Josh 15:22

And that dude had some moves.

Amanda 15:25

Yeah, no, it was pretty cool. We were you said standing, but our table was right there. Um, and yeah, it was he had a dance battle. So he was right by our table and it was dance battling somebody else who was on the um the stage, and Winthrop was just completely taken by. It was super interesting. But uh what I want to talk about is how you became friends with the people next to us and they started feeding you.

Josh 15:44

First of all, I want to talk about the waiter that we had come to our table. And he started, I don't know if you noticed this, but he started with a full Irish accent.

SPEAKER_02 15:53

No, and then by the end we had none.

Josh 15:55

No, he said, uh, you know, welcome to Raglan Road. You know, whatever it was he said, I can't do a good Irish accent.

Amanda 16:01

Um where you don't sound like you're making a caricature of the Irish accent.

Josh 16:05

That's right. Well, it is. I was like, oh, that's cool. We've got an actual Irish dude.

Amanda 16:09

It was like Taryn or something that sounded Irish. Huh? His name was like Taryn or something.

Josh 16:14

Was it? I thought it was Robert, but what?

Amanda 16:16

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I checked his name tag. I mean, maybe his birth name is Robert, but he was going by Taryn.

Josh 16:21

All I know is that uh he started out with his Irish accent, and then uh pretty quickly it had jumped on a plane and flown across the pond, and he turned into a dude who worked at a bait and tackle shop in Raleigh, North Carolina.

Amanda 16:37

Very quickly dropped his accent.

Josh 16:38

It was the weirdest thing. His accent migrated and we saw it happen, and it was let back into the country, so good for him. But I I was like, are they told to try to do an Irish accent? And he just like he bailed on it because it was end of shift. It was the weirdest thing.

SPEAKER_02 16:54

I don't know. I don't know.

Josh 16:55

So we settle in, we we order food that's way too expensive, especially me. I order something that I thought would be an amazing meal and huge because it it costs it was it cost a lot. So I'm like, I'm gonna get this nice big fucking thing came and it was like a medallion. A medallion of slow roasted beef. Yeah. This cow that gave his life, that sacrificed his life for this meal, better have been like the Dalai Lama version of cows. Better have been like royalty, cow royalty up on a hill somewhere. Better been massaged. You know they have this beef that's massaged, Wegu or whatever. This Joker better have been massaged, better have gotten daily bo jobs. Oh, I don't know. All I'm saying is this is a family-friendly show. Oh, is it? Fuck, I'll have to bleep that out. You know what I'm saying, though, it's like it was not worth it. On the plate, the thing that was the best was the mashed potatoes. Yeah, and I know those weren't expensive. Yeah, it's one of those things. Tommy Tiernan, who's an Irish, funnily enough, an Irish comedian, talks about food or drink that the experience of it is ruined by the cost of it. Yeah, yeah. At some point, it's like, well, this beef is just never gonna be good enough for whatever. But that was a choice that you made. Right, because I thought my expectation was, and I looked around and I saw all these big plates of food. I was like, awesome. Yeah, this is a thing that I'm gonna do. So anyway, uh luckily my um my meal was bolstered. I get up, I go to the restroom, I come back, and you have made friends with the old couple next to us.

Amanda 18:28

Yeah, I don't know their names, but I know that they moved from Michigan to Georgia. They've been in Georgia for 10 years. They've lived in three different locations in Georgia. They live almost in the Blue Ridge part of Georgia, but not quite. But they're really hoping to move to Orlando.

Josh 18:44

Okay. So when you're on, when you're not dealing with the stress of hormones and all this and that, you make friends faster than Wi-Fi connects.

unknown 18:53

I know.

Amanda 18:54

I am a Milligan. It is absolutely my daddy. This is not my mama, this is my daddy. But yeah, no, that well, because the woman started, she actually initiated it. She leaned over and said, Because we should say that we were sitting at those tables where one is just one giant long bench and then there's individual tables, right? And chairs across. So she was sitting next to us. Winthrop and I were still sitting there while you were in the bathroom, and she oh no, wait, you took Winthrop to the bathroom. So I was by myself.

Josh 19:20

Yeah.

Amanda 19:21

So she leaned over and said, I'm you know, I'm sorry to bother you, but how was your meal? We've never eaten here before. So I started talking to her about it and and then learned all these things about them in the time it took you and Winthrop to go to the bathroom and come back.

Josh 19:33

All I know is that I get back, you introduce me to them. Well, I don't know their name, so I just like hey, these people. Yeah. These random white folks. Like I'm talking to them or whatever, and they're talking through what they want to eat. All of a sudden, dude offers me a bite of his food.

Amanda 19:50

He cut so this thing came out, and they were it was on individual forks, and so we couldn't figure out what it was, and so you asked him about it, which I was proud of you because you were engaging, because sometimes you just don't you don't engage, or you're very polite, but you you know, you're not gonna perpetuate this. And so you asked what it was, and it was a beer-battered sausage. So I look over and not the man has not pulled off one of the individual forks and given you a full sausage, he has cut one in half and put it on a fork and handed it to you. So it's like he's baby birding you, like he's feeding you this time.

Josh 20:24

I'm glad he didn't baby bird me. But you realize that offering me food is like skipping three levels of friendship.

SPEAKER_02 20:29

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josh 20:30

Like next, I expected to be introduced to the cousins and be invited to the weddings. Who knows? Had you gotten their names, we'd probably have Thanksgiving plans by now. Don't know if they're names, but I know where they live. And I mean, I just it's the thing is I leave for five minutes and I come back and you started a spin-off podcast with these people. I don't understand it. Which is why it's so funny. And I don't necessarily need to talk about perimenopause because I feel like every episode is about perimenopause, but like the tremendous change in you as you are experiencing this, you Mr. Grinch it backwards.

Amanda 21:04

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josh 21:05

Yeah, yeah.

Amanda 21:06

You're like at a level of you know what's interesting is I what I didn't even have a drink. Like, I this is how I've started saving money when we go to Disney Springs. I don't drink. Yeah. Because it's I do. I I know, and I pay I pay for that. But um, I mean like monetarily because I bought dinner. Um, I um it's it's absolutely just way too expensive. So I just drink soda out of lime, done, fine. Um, so I wasn't even like socially lubricated. I was just in a good space. I think it I I don't know why. The music you brought my patch because I had run out of them. So when you came down and met me in Orlando, you brought the patch. I don't know.

Josh 21:41

But you know what genuinely hurts me is that we meet interesting people and we don't get their names.

Amanda 21:47

Um You should have given them a podcast card.

Josh 21:50

Every podcaster knows this feeling. Like three years from now, we're gonna need like a or want a guest and be like, Oh, remember those people at Disney Springs that were so interesting? They had this great life story. It's like Damn it. Instead of like creating a connection, like I said, giving them a podcast card, we created like our own personal cold case. We can never find these people again.

Amanda 22:10

Well, we did see them again after we went to the We did, and we missed our shot a second time. Yeah. Yep. But it was a lovely evening. I enjoyed because then the night before had been so bad. And so I think that that's why it was just like this is so nice.

Josh 22:23

Maybe that's what it was.

Amanda 22:24

Because you and Winthrop drove down on Wednesday to meet me, and I guess he got car sick. Yeah.

Josh 22:31

But we're going with that. He got sick. And so we had to we had to drug him um and put him in bed. And then so we were going to sleep at like 6 30 or something. Yeah.

Amanda 22:44

So because I gave him dreamamine because he's really not I wanted to clarify what the drug was because he had a headache.

Josh 22:50

We did not roofie our child.

Amanda 22:52

Maybe it was a legit migraine, but he had a really bad headache, like didn't even want to be in the pool. That's how we knew this was a thing. And you know, you just texted me, like we had walked down to get in the car to go to dinner, and before we ever got in the car, he was like, I gotta go to the bathroom. So we came back upstairs and then you texted me, get dramamine stat. So I ran across the street to the Walgreens. So we gave him dramamine, gave him ibuprofen. He was asleep by six. So we were in a dark hotel room with no, I think I ate like cold leftover pizza that he had had for lunch. You ate barbecue like rice cakes for dinner.

Josh 23:24

Oh, they were good.

Amanda 23:26

Um, we had the the curtains drawn, so it was dark and cool for him. And you and I sat in that dark hotel room, watched Top Chef on my laptop and went to sleep by like 7:30. So I think we were just like, well, we're out in the world, nobody's sick. We got lovely Irish dancing and music, and I made friends.

Josh 23:44

Welcome to the Wilsons. Can't believe y'all are listening to this podcast.

Perimenopause Brain Fog And Ninja Dreams

Amanda 23:49

Anyway, um, but speaking of pyramidopause, my listen, I just full on told the people um that you were presenting to. Well, I was presenting to Wednesday and Thursday because I was in the middle of talking and just totally forgot what I was talking about. And this facilitation I'm doing on the science of reading, I've done it so many times. Like I barely have to look at my notes. I mean, it's just a thing that I do. And I would just stop. And so I said, I apologize to like the two male presenting people in the room. And I'm like, I'm gonna apologize to you now. Uh perimenopause has me in its grasp and words fall out of my head. So if I just pause and it, I can't, I'll get there. Please just be patient. And on Wednesday, when I did this, one of the teachers yelled out, You're in a safe space, which I fully appreciated. And then on Thursday, no one did that. But then at the break, a woman came up to me and said, Listen, I want to talk to you. I think you should check out the HRT patch. And I said, Oh, I'm wearing it. Like it's and then she said, Maybe it's time to up your dosage. And I said, You are not wrong. But what's lovely is that like I'm in a room full of women who are approximately my age, right? And so it is a safe space. But yesterday, 29. Thank you. Yesterday, uh, Winthrop has decided his new venture in life. And I don't know if you have this on your notes to talk about uh soccer is over, the season's over, he's never playing again, he says. So he really, really, really wants to be an American Ninja Warrior.

Josh 25:13

Yes, he wants to be a ninja warrior.

Amanda 25:15

So we uh there's a ninja class here at a Discern Country Gym, but they're due like an open, an open class on Saturdays, so you can try it out before you sign up for the classes. So we went yesterday and he had a great time. He got up the wall the first time, a little warped wall the first time, had a really good time. But there were uh a couple sitting next to us, and I'm sure they are lovely people, but my paramenopause rage was raging so hard at just the existence of people yesterday. So it's I can't, I don't know. The guy, probably a really nice guy. I was annoyed that he was sitting there eating apple jacks out of a Tupperware container. I don't know why. I shouldn't be judging his food choices, but it just annoyed me. And so I cannot predict when the paramenopause is gonna hit or not hit and when I'm gonna feel social and not social. And that must be, I'm not trying to make this about you because it's not, but also you have to live with it. That must be a little bit like difficult for you because you just don't know which version of me you're getting.

Josh 26:10

Yeah, but I love you.

Amanda 26:12

Thank you. That was the right answer.

Josh 26:14

Did that sound hostage video enough?

Amanda 26:16

It did, it did. That's that was also your Stockholm syndrome.

Josh 26:19

I'm gonna tell you, men, if you've made it this far in the podcast, don't ignore any of this. Like we talk about this shit, so you maybe will understand what's going on and you can have some empathy. Um, so that's that's why we talk about this stuff. And I'm speaking specifically to you uh men out there who are young in your relationship. Just just know that that this could quite probably be a thing, and just be aware. Hello, friends, super familiar with the Wilsons, would like to offer you exclusively the Amanda Wilson Instant Friendship Kit. Each kit includes emergency conversation starters, pocket-sized life story exchange cards, and a coupon book for future holiday invitations. I can tell you with Amanda's patented system, I can go to the restroom for 90 seconds and come back to discover Amanda has become godmother to someone's children. The Amanda Wilson Instant Friendship Kit. Meet strangers, leave with inheritance rights. Um

Pantry Purge With Neighbor Kate

Josh 27:35

super familiar with the So exciting thing that's happened in the Wilson's life is we've cleaned out the pantry yesterday. Jesus, we're so we're so old. We're not only so old, but we're so interesting. What interesting life we leave.

Amanda 27:56

You know who's gonna be really interested in this version of the podcast? What? Neighbor Kate. Neighbor Kate helped. Because neighbor Kate stars in this uh segment.

Josh 28:04

Yesterday morning, folks, I wandered downstairs. Amanda and I had been discussing cleaning out the pantry because we're kind of going from room to room and trying to make this house a little bit more neat and organized. And the pantry, I think for most people, really just becomes a hole at some point. It's just because you keep shoving things on top of things. I took everything out of the pantry, and the pantry holds a surprising amount of things.

Amanda 28:29

Because it's a walk-in pantry. This is not like it's not just a small pantry. This is a decent sized pantry.

Josh 28:34

Also, it but you think of walk-in pantry, you think of like a butler's pantry?

Amanda 28:37

That's not what I mean.

Josh 28:38

No, not not a closet pantry. It's like you take one step, you've walked in, and that's as far as you can go. Let's not oversell.

Amanda 28:43

Let me tell you though.

Josh 28:45

Well, two steps because you're smaller than I am.

Amanda 28:47

No, when the children and I were here by ourselves and we had tornadoes out on the main road.

Josh 28:51

Yeah.

Amanda 28:51

That like a tornado had touched down out on the main road. Yeah, the kids and I went into the pantry with the dog and sat. So it is.

Josh 28:58

We would not have been able to do it with the pantry the way it was before the streaming.

Amanda 29:02

It is a decent sized pantry. So so when I came downstairs, I sleep in on the weekends. Now Josh lets me finally. He's learned.

Josh 29:08

Let's you.

Amanda 29:09

Well, you used to wake me up on Saturdays to go to breakfast until I yelled about it and then you stopped. Um, I came downstairs and every single item. I mean, the pantry was empty. And our, we have a very large kitchen island, was totally covered. The kitchen counters were covered, and the dining room table that seats eight or ten was completely covered. It was so much for me to walk down to before I'd even had coffee.

Josh 29:37

It was fun to surprise you in that way.

Amanda 29:39

It was like, what in the fresh hell has happened?

Josh 29:42

Um, yeah. And so the idea was I would take everything out, I'd put it out on the kitchen island, and then Amanda would come down and figure out who to vote off of the island, and then we put the stuff back in. And I figured we would gain like a little, you know, square footage.

SPEAKER_04 29:58

Yeah.

Josh 29:59

My God, the before and after. I didn't take a before picture, but the after-cause you have a picture of all the stuff on the countertop, though. Well, that's true. That's true. But the after was, I was just shocked. Like we really must have gotten rid of a lot of shit.

Amanda 30:13

Well, we so it was great though, because you everybody needs a Kate because Josh sent it. We have a group chat with Kate and Tony and me and Josh, and Josh sent a picture in it, and this is Kate's like, this is where Kate shines. Kate was buzzing to come over and help. And so I felt really bad, but then I'm like, no, this actually makes makes her happy. So I went and got coffee and went and bought some organizer things uh for dry goods and came back and I said, Okay, yes, please come help me. And Kate came over and it was great because I started to say, Do you want this? Do you want this? She said, Nope, stop. I am gonna go through expiration dates. You are gonna take everything that you know does not get eaten, and you are going to put it in the living room, and then I will come over and shop later. But don't like she was bossing me around, but in a way that I took from her that I would not have taken from you.

Josh 31:06

Oh, yeah, clearly. I'm gonna have to take some lessons, is what it is.

Amanda 31:08

No, no, no. You just can't do it. You just have to get her to come over and do it.

Josh 31:12

That's weird. Kate, I need to convince Amanda to do this. Can you please come over?

Amanda 31:15

You've over talked to Amanda.

Josh 31:16

Well, now wait a second. Would I have to be like really surreptitious about that? Or could I just say in the group chat, Kate, please come over and convince Amanda of this? And you'd see that and you'd be more like, oh shit, I guess I'm gonna have to do it now. Yeah.

Amanda 31:30

Or do I need to like trick like No, because you said I'm gonna be, I will do this with you, but I am going, I am not gonna be like, what you said, you're gonna be judicious or not judicious. You're gonna be something about what we were getting rid of.

Josh 31:44

I was gonna be very, very militant about what we get rid of, and you would not have taken that from me, but you took that from Kate.

Amanda 31:50

Right, and so it wasn't.

Josh 31:51

Which by the way, now I'm annoyed.

Amanda 31:52

Now that I think about this, that annoys me. I'm not married to Kate. This is the difference.

Josh 31:58

No, that no, that's not the direction that this should go.

Amanda 32:01

But Kate is also an organizing expert. She has receipts and you and you do not yet. So anyway.

Josh 32:09

I built this fucking pub that and organized all this shit.

Amanda 32:12

That you did.

Josh 32:13

Apparently, no credit goes to me for that.

Amanda 32:15

Hush, of course it does, but this wasn't about building a pub, was it? It was about organizing a pantry. And you know what Kate has that you don't have?

Josh 32:22

Boobs.

Amanda 32:23

A label maker.

Josh 32:24

Oh, okay, sure.

Amanda 32:25

So not only did everything get organized, but then Kate gave me the label maker. And then Winthrop got really into it last night. So Winthrop was making labels and I was labeling things. I'm so excited. I sent Kate a picture of it this morning. Like, don't worry, it's still organized.

Josh 32:38

I do have a question though, and this is a question not only for you, although you're the the object of the question. This is a question for everyone out there who saves every single paper bag that they get from the grocery store. Why? I have never in my life thought, you know what would solve this problem? The 20 paper bags that we have from Publix from 2021. Never has that been a thing. What are you saving them for exactly? We don't cover our middle school math books anymore. What do we save them for?

Amanda 33:09

Well, I save them because we usually put well we'll put one paper bag out in the kitchen and that's where the recycling goes, and then we take it to the recycling bin. So that's what I save them for.

Josh 33:21

We had enough to do recycling for the whole neighborhood for seven years.

SPEAKER_02 33:26

Okay.

Josh 33:27

Well these paper bags have done their service. They need to be retired. Okay. The Smithsonian Institute has less things in their archives than we had paper bags in our pantry.

Amanda 33:39

Well, you whittled some down, and I am much, much better and more intentional about taking my reusable bags now. So I'm not, I haven't brought home a paper bag in a while.

Josh 33:46

Very good. But so that was all built up from before. That wasn't even added to in how long? Of months.

Amanda 33:52

Yeah. I'm also really sad though, because Kate told me the same thing you said, which is that Elatra County doesn't actually recycle because it costs too much. So they have this front of sending the recycling truck, but then it just all gets in the dump together, and I'm very sad about it. Because I get mad at you when you throw cans away.

Josh 34:08

Yeah.

Amanda 34:08

But apparently, and Kate still recycles too. But apparently what? Apparently I'm what? You have no, and I'm not saying you're right. I'm saying that there was a reason behind why you were doing what you were doing, and possibly it's valid.

Josh 34:23

I will take I'm valid, but I I know that what you're saying is I'm right.

Game Time: What Color Is Taste?

Josh 34:48

It's game time. That song, of course, is by AJCW, our middle son Andrew. Check out his things on Spotify, on Apple Music, on all the other places on Bandcamp. Yeah. AJCW, he does really cool music. Amanda, are you ready for game time?

Amanda 35:07

No, because you told me that I needed a blindfold for it, and that's concerning.

Josh 35:11

This game is based on an interaction I had with Winthrop this week. Winthrop told me, like, apropos of nothing, by the way, which is where we get a lot of the little gems from from Winthrop. He said, You know, Dad, I can tell what color a food is just by its taste.

Amanda 35:29

Really?

Josh 35:30

And I'm like, what? And he said, Yeah, I could I can tell.

Amanda 35:34

This sounds like a retinlink, good mythical morning episode.

Josh 35:37

Yeah, but but they are way past their prime. We're taking up the mantle, but you now are gonna play this. And there's no this is not a gotcha thing. This is not a ha ha ha, isn't this funny? I made you eat a thing thing. I'm just really curious. I don't want to know what the food is. I want to know if you can tell me what color it is. And these are all edible things that came from you're giving to me that I won't eat.

Amanda 36:00

Like there's no fish in here.

Josh 36:01

No, no, no, no, of course not. You know me better than that. Oh man, I wish I had fish.

Amanda 36:04

Uh-huh.

Josh 36:05

Are you ready to play What Color Is This Taste?

Amanda 36:08

Yes, but I do have to tell you that he made me play, because I drove him back from Orlando on Friday. He made me play Guess What I'm Eating based on the sound my chewing is.

Josh 36:18

Oh, that's a good game, too. We should do that one next week.

Amanda 36:21

He was eating all gummies, so then I had to guess between sour gummy, regular gummy, like Alright.

Josh 36:27

So I want you to blindfold up.

SPEAKER_02 36:29

That's not the first time you said that. I can't. Uh-uh. This is not right.

Josh 36:34

Okay, no, now it does look like you're in a hostage situation. Can you please let me do that?

Amanda 36:40

Alright, Josh is placing the blindfold on me. Josh is making the blindfold probably too tight. This is ah okay. No, I cannot see. I can see my nose, but um, I'll I'll just keep my eyes closed.

Josh 36:55

All right, you need to also take special care not to smell what's going on. Now, these are in no particular order.

Amanda 37:00

Special care not to smell. I don't how do I just okay, don't smell. Okay, got it.

Josh 37:05

All right, let me get this tray.

Amanda 37:07

You know what I learned from our friend Lakendra? That wasabi is was originally served with sushi, not for taste or flavor or whatever, but because before refrigeration, no, before refrigeration, um, eating raw fish could be dangerous because it would grow bacteria, and wasabi was um like an anti-something that would happen would go into your gut and fight the bacteria.

Josh 37:31

That's right, folks. An anti-something. Welcome to the Wilsons We Teach You Kindness.

Amanda 37:36

I am a medical podcast.

Josh 37:37

All right. So, Amanda, here's your first thing. What color is this thing?

Amanda 37:43

It's really weird to eat food and not be able to see it. It makes me immediately want to not like it. You know that, right? That's red.

Josh 37:54

That's red. Extra points if you can tell me what it is.

Amanda 37:56

That's marinara sauce.

Josh 37:57

Marinera sauce is red. Okay, very good. Now, what about that made it red to you?

Amanda 38:03

I knew it was marinara sauce.

Josh 38:04

No, no, no. You're not getting into the spirit of the game. Why is it? All right, immediately this game has gone south. All right, ready? Here's the next thing. So you have one right.

Amanda 38:18

Lord, that noise is terrifying. Oh, good. Giving me random things from the refrigerator that you don't even know what it is. Here we go. Okay. That's like that's like clear or beige.

Josh 38:33

What do you think it is?

Amanda 38:35

It tastes like a cheese.

Josh 38:37

Okay. I'm not gonna give that to you. It was a cheese, a cheddar cheese. It's it's yellowish orange.

Amanda 38:41

Oh yeah, no. I was thinking it was like whitish.

SPEAKER_02 38:44

Okay. I don't like that.

Josh 38:47

It's been sitting out for a while.

Amanda 38:48

Where's my water? Why are you d banging things? Where's my water? That's not my water. Where's my water?

Josh 38:53

Alright, here's the next thing, and I will have you know the dog is now standing up because he's I hear him.

Amanda 38:59

He wants to play this game too.

Josh 39:01

Alright, here's your next thing. Ready?

Amanda 39:04

Oh god. Oh god, what is that? Oh I know what that is.

Josh 39:10

What color is it?

Amanda 39:11

No, it's yellow because it's well, it's like a light, that's lemon. But I wouldn't have gone with that. I don't know. I would have gone with green.

Josh 39:18

Oh, because you thought it was a line.

Amanda 39:22

No, maybe it was just because sour, I and I'm not sure. So that's interesting.

Josh 39:25

You wouldn't now you have to say what you would have gone with, though. So you would have guessed green.

Amanda 39:30

Yeah, because it had like a vinegary pickly taste, so that would have I mean I you're you're automatically going to you understand that Winthrop is saying he can guess the color of a food, right? Based on its taste, because he knows that it it like he equates it to s to something.

Josh 39:45

All right, don't fuck with my game. Ready? Here's the next one.

Amanda 39:50

Brown.

Josh 39:51

That's brown.

Amanda 39:52

It's one of the um peanut butter cereal things. Let's have more of those. Okay, but here's the thing. Was it light brown or dark brown? Because that cereal has a light brown and a dark brown.

Josh 40:04

Well, you have to tell me. Was that light brown or dark brown?

Amanda 40:06

I think it was a dark brown.

Josh 40:07

It was dark brown, very good. All right, here's the next thing. This is compelling listening, and no, it's not.

Amanda 40:15

Um and I said dark brown because I really thought it was the peanut butter one, but it tasted more dark brown.

SPEAKER_02 40:22

All right, there's another one.

Josh 40:25

That's purple. It's a calamana olive. Yep, there you go. So you think that that the taste of calamana olives is a purple taste.

Amanda 40:32

It's a dark color. It was dark. Maybe I should say darker light because like I know what these things are. All right, vanilla olives and peanut butter cereal, not a good comment.

Josh 40:43

This one I kind of apologize for.

Amanda 40:45

Nope, don't want it. Don't want it. Okay. I know what this is, but I would have said pink, but I know that it's white.

Josh 40:56

Yeah, you would have said pink. So that's the answer we're gonna go with there, pink. Vanilla frosting. Vanilla frosting, yeah. I apologize because that's probably off your diet.

Amanda 41:03

It is.

Josh 41:04

All right, last thing. This is now, this is expert level here. What color is this?

Amanda 41:08

Hold on, let me let me clean my palette. Where's my water?

Josh 41:11

Alright, here we go. Ready?

Amanda 41:12

Nope. What a freak.

Josh 41:16

Oh, it wasn't the last thing. I've got one.

Amanda 41:18

Don't like it. Is that my flaxseed?

Josh 41:21

What color is it?

Amanda 41:23

Like brown.

Josh 41:24

Like brown. Why what's what's brown about it to you?

Amanda 41:26

Because it tastes like my flaxseed.

Josh 41:28

It's not flaxseed. Is that flaxseed? No. What color is it?

Amanda 41:32

It's still brown.

Josh 41:33

Okay. I'm not gonna give that to you because it's dark orange. It's paprika.

Amanda 41:38

Oh, that was paprika?

Josh 41:40

Yeah.

Amanda 41:40

It did not taste like it. But I think that I'm so overwhelmed by the sweetness of the vanilla frosting, I couldn't get it.

Josh 41:46

All right. This is the last thing here.

Amanda 41:47

Okay. That was so yummy. I couldn't eat that whole jar. Okay, here's the thing. I know what this is. This is a banana pepper. It's like a yellowish cream. However, it felt more like a darker cream.

Josh 41:59

Oh, interesting. Okay. So, all right. Well, after all of that, next time I'm going to do this with stuff that I don't know whether you've had it before. Um, because that would prove to be a big one.

Amanda 42:10

I sell stuff from my kitchen. Like, this is all these are all ingredients I use except for the vanilla frosting.

Josh 42:14

Well, I'm sorry. We do this podcast for free. Okay. So I'm not going to go.

Amanda 42:18

If you want to sponsor me, Josh can go get, you know.

Josh 42:21

Basically, that was uh another version of now cleaning out our refrigerator, but I turned it into a game. All right, folks, why don't you yourselves get your own game of what color does this taste and uh let us know how it went. Was it more interesting?

Amanda 42:34

Film it's send it to us. We'll put it on our socials.

Josh 42:36

It's likely that it was more interesting than this, so we'll put it on our socials and we'll take the likes. Alright, Amanda, that's all there is. There is

Thanks, Credits, And Wrap-Up

Josh 42:55

no more. What'd you think of that mess?

Amanda 42:56

I think that I am a little bit nauseated now.

Josh 42:59

Okay.

Amanda 43:00

There's a lot of things to put together, like banana peppers and vanilla frosting and paprika and lemon and uh what else was in there?

Josh 43:10

It was kind of a journey, though.

Amanda 43:11

I took you on a You did take me on a culinary journey.

Josh 43:13

Culinary journey. All right, so Amanda and I would like to thank the following people. We'd like to thank Antonio and Josh Scar, Daniel J. Buckets, Chicken Tom, R.I.P., Matt, Monique from Germany, Joey. Joey, Leo, Refine, Gay Jeff, Ryan Baker, and Kate and Tony, Mark and Rachel and Dan and Gavin.

Amanda 43:35

And my new friends from Raglan Road.

Josh 43:37

Whose name we don't know. We will never have them on the phone. Bob and Sue. I've made them. They look like a Bob and Sue. Also, thank you to AJCW for the music that you're listening to right now. And the music for Game Time. Thank you for Ricky Kendall for our theme song.

Amanda 43:53

Such a good song.

Josh 43:54

It is such a good song.

Amanda 43:55

I like it so much.

Josh 43:56

You know, it's funny because they say that in podcasting, you shouldn't have a really long theme song, a really long starting section that you need to like have it be a couple seconds, boom, and go. And when Ricky had sent me that song, I would only play like the last bit of it. I was like, I freaking love this song. It's so good. So I don't care what you're supposed to do in podcasting. I want to hear the dance.

Amanda 44:16

It's our friend, and he's got an amazing voice, and he wrote this song, and we love it.

Josh 44:19

Yeah, and so also uh we got some little interstitial music in there by Chris Bairn of the Spin Doctors, who we will have on probably not next week, but the week after. Um we're gonna have him on to just share about his adventures and talk a little bit about him about being a rock star, but also being uh a parent. Uh we've never talked to him about that. So there you go. All right, so um, until next time, folks, you all take it easy and make sure that you're tasting the colors.

SPEAKER_02 44:51

Kill be kind. Bye. Bye.

Josh 44:53

That game is one of the worst things that we've ever done. After I let subject entering property, volunteering, yeah, saying voluntarily saying. She said subject entering property, volunteering she said no. She said, Subject entering property voluntarily wearing Jesus Christ. Voluntarily. Voluntarily. Okay.